The Games Afoot
by Cybelluk
Summary: Bruce, Dick and Alfred have a well deserved holiday,but still can not avoid solving a crime.


_Almost all the locations are real and the information regarding each place is as accurate as possible. (Including the menus!)._

_The radio station Mansfield 103.2 is my local radio station. _

_I have used some artistic licence with the events they attend, and of course the crime and interior layout of the crime scene is fictional._

_Again I have submitted the story in its entirety so I apologise for the length, but then again it's only like reading several chapters at once._

**THE GAMES AFOOT!**

Dick settled back into the soft roomy cream leather seat and eased it into a more reclined position, the novel he had been reading open on his knee. He stretched a little and sighed, he wasn't so much bored as somewhat tired. This period of enforced idleness making him feel listless.

He glanced around.

Alfred was snoring gently, reclined in a seat opposite, sleeping off the dinner they had not long since eaten. Bruce was further down the cabin, sat hunched over a laptop working as usual. For him this was a business trip, for Dick and Alfred it was a much-needed chance of a vacation. They had both jumped at the chance to accompany Bruce on the long flight.

"I will be able to go and visit my niece in Oxford, and maybe some other old friends." Alfred had enthused. "Maybe, young Sir, you would accompany me?" He had asked, noticing the 'and what am I meant to do' look on Dicks face.

Dick stretched. He ached from having sat so long. He contemplated getting up and stretching his legs.

"Can I get you anything sir?" The stewardess interrupted his daydream.

"Nothing, thank you, I'm fine."

She smiled at him and proceeded down the aisle to where Bruce was sat.

Dick picked up his book and tried to concentrate on the words. He had been meaning to read this particular book, 'Three Days to Never', since his friend Kent had recommended it ages ago and hadn't had the time. The flight had seemed like a good opportunity to do so.

"Wake up sleepy head." A hand on his shoulder roused him. Dick opened his eyes. Bruce was patting his shoulder to wake him. Dick yawned.

"What? Are we there yet?" He grinned shaking his head.

"Funny." Bruce grinned back. "But yes, we are getting ready to land in a short while. You enjoy your sleep?"

"Err yes thanks. Did you get any?"

"I nodded off for about an hour." Bruce sat in the seat next to Dick as the stewardess walked up the aisle towards them.

"We will be landing shortly, would you fasten your seat belts please."

Dick and Bruce nodded and complied with the instruction. Alfred pulled his seat into the upright position and did the same.

The Wayne Enterprises Gulfstream V touched down, with only the slightest of bumps, expertly handled by its pilot.

Although Bruce was an accomplished pilot himself he preferred to let someone else fly the plane on these occasions. He said it gave him the time to catch up on the paperwork.

They got through the arrivals procedures, custom checks etc, without too much trouble.

"So what's next?" Dick asked.

He hadn't had much of a hand in the itinerary. Alfred had made all the travel plans, with instructions as what was required from Bruce.

"We have a car and chauffer hired." Alfred informed him. I was going to just hire a car but Master Bruce insisted I sit back and enjoy this trip. Speaking of which I believe that is him over there." He nodded towards a man in a uniform holding up a sign saying 'Wayne Party'.

The Chauffer introduced himself as William and took over pushing the trolley with the luggage from Dick. The three followed him out to the parking lot where an immaculate Rolls Royce was parked. William opened the car and allowed his passengers to get in whilst he loaded the luggage into the boot. Alfred, unaccustomed to being waited on in this manner, started to help.

"It's ok Sir." William insisted. "I can manage, but thank you all the same."

"Alfred, the whole idea of this is to give you a break." Bruce called, laughing. "Come on for once let someone else look after things."

"I'm sorry Sir, It's just, well you know?"

"I do and it's Bruce. Drop the Sir, there's no need for titles whilst we are here, Alfred you are travelling in back with us too." He said as Alfred began to climb into the front passenger seat

"Very well Sir."

"ALFRED!" Bruce and Dick said in unison.

William got behind the wheel and started the car up.

"Do you want to go straight to your hotel Sir?" he asked.

"Yes please." Bruce answered. "But take the scenic route we are not staying in the capital for long so we may as well get a look at it even if it's only in passing."

"Very good Sir." William closed the shutter between the passenger area and front seats.

"Does it feel good to be 'home' Alfred?" Dick asked him.

"You know young man it's been so long since I last managed to visit I almost feel like a tourist now."

"I'm sure you are looking forward to seeing Barbara? Although I'm not sure she will be glad to see me." Dick chuckled remembering their previous encounters.

Although they most certainly had a great deal of affection for each other they usually argued, albeit good-naturedly. Alfred reckoned they should have been brother and sister the way they carried on.

When Dick had been poisoned she had been quick to send get-well messages and had badgered Alfred for news. She had rung Alfred distraught at the news that Dick had 'died', and then in fury when it was revealed it had been a hoax. When he had been badly beaten she had been in touch with Dick constantly, expressing concern. As soon as he was better though the sarcastic comments and digs had started again. Thankfully they both had a similar sense of humour so the 'arguments' never impinged on their friendship.

Dick settled back in his seat and watched the sights of London pass the window.

The Roll Royce pulled up in front of the Langhams Hotel. Dick gazed up at its classic Victorian façade in awe. William opened the kerbside door and they all climbed out. "I'll see to the luggage Sir, whilst you check in." He said indicating in the direction of the entrance. "This is a bit grand aint it?" Dick said to no one in particular. "When one travels, there is no point in doing so if one does not do it in style." Bruce said putting on an affected aristocratic British accent. "No there most certainly is not, I agree old chap." Alfred joined in. Dick laughed as he followed Bruce and Alfred up the red-carpeted stairs and through the dark wood and glass revolving doors. "I'll check in." Alfred said as he made towards the front desk. "He just can't quite let go can he?" Dick laughed. 

"Nope. I suppose its hard when its what you're used to. He has always 'run' everything, old habits die hard." Bruce agreed.

"It's meant a holiday for him." Dick pointed out. "As I understand it we are visiting places where Alfred has old friends so as he can visit them, as well as see Barbara."

"Well as long as he is happy. I'm certainly not going to argue with him, he would never let me forget it."

"Master Bruce." Alfred began, "I mean Sir, Bruce." He went on as Bruce and Dick threw him the 'What did we tell you?' look. "We're booked in and our luggage is being taken care of. Young man I hope you don't mind but the suite has only two bedrooms one of which has twin beds. Do you have any objection to sharing with me?"

They moved to the lifts, following the sharply dressed deputy manager who had taken it upon himself to direct them to their suite.

The doors slid open and they boarded. The manager pressed the button for the relevant floor. The doors slid shut. The lifts movement upwards was barely perceptible. There was an awkward silence for a short time.

"Hey! Why can't Bruce share with you?" Dick asked, as if just realising what had been said, seemingly affronted at the idea, then a wide grin spread across his face. "No Alfred I don't mind." He patted Alfred on the back, chuckling.

"Got you there didn't I?"

"I rather think you did. I will get you back though." Alfred warned.

"No doubt you will. Probably by snoring very loudly and keeping me awake."

The lift doors slid open again.

The Deputy Manager unlocked the door and they followed him into the suite.

"This looks nice." Dick cast his eyes round.

"Not bad." Bruce agreed.

As the Deputy Manager described the facilities, Dick began to explore the suite opening and shutting doors. Eventually the man left, handing over the keys to Bruce.

'_I hope you will enjoy your stay and please don't hesitate to ask if you need anything else.' _He said on parting.

Bruce and Alfred went to their respective bedrooms. Dick eventually followed Alfred.

"Do you have any preference as to which bed you would like?" Alfred asked him.

"Nah, not really. He sat on the bed furthest from the door. "This will do. So what's the plan?"

"Well, we had thought that we would have dinner, maybe visit the bar, but we thought it would be a good idea to retire early. You and I are catching the Nine thirty am train to Oxford. William will take us to the station."

"Right."

"You will only need to take enough for a couple of nights stay. The rest of our luggage will accompany Bruce when he meets us in Oxford. Oh and again I apologise but I was only able to procure a room with twin beds for our stay in Oxford. It seems that the hotels are very busy at present."

"That's ok Alfred, I honestly don't mind. So where to after that?"

"We are then travelling to Nottingham. I'm going to meet an old friend there. You and Bruce will be able to do some sightseeing. After that we go on to Aberdeenshire in Scotland. Again I am meeting another of my friends. We are going to stay there a few days before we fly home."

"Sounds ok to me."

"Is this your first time abroad?" Alfred enquired.

"Well not exactly. The circus came here once. I think we were here for about two weeks." Dick's brow furrowed as he tried to remember. "Not that I remember much about it. I mean we were working nights and travelling most of the following day, so it's a bit of a blur. You know, its Monday so we must be in Manchester, type of scenario. Plus I was a bit young at the time."

"Well, well, that does surprise me. I didn't realise the Flying Grayson's were internationally famous."

"Ah well, I suspect there's a lot you don't know about that side of my life." Dick tapped the side of his nose grinning, as he lay back on the bed. "Hmm this is real comfy." He remarked appreciatively.

Alfred perched on the edge of his bed.

"You're right it is." He agreed as he glanced at his watch. "I think, that is if no one minds, I will have a lie down until we have to go to dinner."

"Ok. What time would you want to be woken?" Dick jumped up. "I'll go sit in the lounge give you some space."

"You had better check with Master Bruce." Dick cocked his head at Alfred. "Ok you had better check with Bruce. I'm sorry, you know old habits and all that."

"Right ho." Dick disappeared out of the bedroom.

"Bruce." He poked his head round the master bedroom door. "Hey wow could they have not got a bigger bed in here?"

"What? Oh right. It is rather big, although it's probably about as big as yours back home. Your room ok?"

"Yes its fine. Alfred's going to have a lie down and he said to ask you what time you were thinking of having dinner, so I can wake him in time to get dressed."

Bruce glanced at his watch.

"Hmm, well its just after four so I'm sure we can give him a couple of hours. What are you going to do? I have to get some of this paperwork sorted out for tomorrow."

"I think I'll just put the TV on and vegetate a while. I know we didn't do much but this travelling is quite tiring. That's if you don't mind. Oh tell you what do you fancy a drink? I can put the kettle on if you'd like? I noticed the stuff in the kitchenette."

"That would be good. I thought for one minute you were going to raid the bar." Bruce laughed. "Well, you're legally able to here, just."

Dick raised both his eyebrows.

"Coffee, or tea?"

"Coffee. Please."

Having made two cups of coffee and giving Bruce his, Dick flicked on the TV and settled down on the sofa with his.

"Come on you, time to dress for dinner." Bruce was shaking his shoulder gently.

"Huh? Oh I never meant to fall asleep, sorry." Dick yawned and rubbed his face with his hand.

"Come on. I don't know you young 'uns have no staying power." Bruce laughed playfully clipping Dick across the back of his head.

"Oh and you didn't go to sleep, old man." Dick shot back.

"You'll get 'old man'!" Bruce took a step towards Dick who vaulted over the back of the sofa and ran into his and Alfred's bedroom, pulling the door shut after him.

"Just you wait!" Bruce threatened jokingly. "I'll get my own back."

After an enjoyable dinner washed down with a couple of bottles of a rather good wine, they decided that the best plan was to have an early night to allow for any jetlag. They could then start the day refreshed and raring to go.

"You know that was a nice change, all of us sat together for a meal like that." Bruce commented as the lift rose to their floor again. "We really should do it more often."

"Yes I reckon so. I guess though with the lives we lead sadly it won't happen that often."

"I'm afraid that may be the case young man." Alfred nodded. "But I agree it has been nice. It was almost like we were a 'real' family."

"Well I hope that feeling continues, and not just for the duration of this trip either." Bruce asserted as he stepped through the opening lift doors. "You know odd as it may seem, we are 'family', maybe not a conventional one, but family all the same."

Dick and Alfred looked at each other with that knowing look as Bruce fumbled with the key.

"You reckon he's had too much of that wine?" Dick whispered loudly to Alfred.

"I heard that." Bruce looked back feigning hurt feelings.

"I was only joking. Honest." Dick misread the look thinking he had upset Bruce. "It was, is nice. I do feel the same." Dick followed Bruce into the lounge area.

"I'm going to retire for the night. I suggest you don't stay up too long as we agreed earlier."

"Alright Alfred. I wont be long. I'll just give you time to get into bed then I'll be there." Dick sat on the sofa.

"Bruce I am sorry I…"

"Hey its alright I know you were joking I was pulling your leg too." Bruce sat beside him. "Tell me how do you really feel about our 'set up'? You know you, Alfred and me. Are you happy?"

"Yes I am. I mean I know it can never be quite the same as a normal family, far from it, but yes I'm happy enough."

"I do sometimes think I see a sadness in you now and then."

"Bruce I see it in you too. It's not so much to do with the present but I guess it's when we reflect on the past. Maybe that's the glue that binds us together."

Dick turned to face Bruce.

"I often have it said to me that I'm so lucky, you know, being adopted by a multi billionaire. Well I know I am, but I always point out that despite all that, if you had been a real bastard and treated me bad, I most certainly would have walked away before now, but you haven't been, quite the opposite in fact.

I tell them that even if you didn't have any money I would be lucky, because it's you that's important, not the money. I don't think any one really believes me but its true.

I know it's been difficult for you, Alfred's explained that, and I do understand. I suppose we will have our differences and arguments in the future, but I see that with my friends and their 'regular' families anyway.

I do appreciate everything. You know if I had to do it all again I would hope it would still be you taking me in."

"Wow! I don't really know what to say to that." Bruce ran his hand through his hair.

"How about 'Goodnight?" Dick rose and headed towards the bedroom.

"Goodnight." Bruce watched the retreating figure.

He sat for some time going over the things Dick had said. He slowly began to realise that he had a warm feeling growing inside him.

"Boy. I reckon I must have done something right to deserve that." He thought as he too headed for his bedroom.

The jangling of the telephone woke Dick and Alfred. It was their early call.

Dick stretched.

"You can have a bit longer in bed." Alfred offered generously as he headed towards the bathroom. "Well at least until I have completed my ablutions."

"Gee thanks." Dick stretched again. He contemplated today's intended events.

It had certainly been a while since he had seen Barbara in the flesh, although they spoke via a web cam often, especially when Dick wanted to pick her brains about something computer related.

He closed his eyes and stretched yet again, luxuriating in the comfort of the bed.

"Ok young man the bathrooms free." Alfred announced breaking into Dicks daydream.

"Alfred is Bruce joining us this morning, or is he sleeping in?"

"I have asked for breakfast to be sent up here, and yes Bruce will join us. In fact he will accompany us to the station on his way to his business meeting. Now go on shoo, go get ready."

Dick emerged from the bedroom and came and sat at the table where both Alfred and Bruce were consuming a full English breakfast.

"Yours is there." Bruce pointed with his fork to a covered plate on the sideboard.

"Hmm, I'm ready for this." Dick said appreciatively.

"There's nothing like starting a busy day with a good breakfast." Alfred commented.

"I'm not going to argue with that." Dick agreed as he began to tuck into the meal.

A contented silence fell as the three of them ate.

"Well I enjoyed that." Bruce said as he pushed his plate aside. He reached for the large pot and poured himself a cup of dark aromatic coffee. He added some cream.

Dick raised an eyebrow at this.

"Being a little indulgent aren't we?"

"Well if you cant indulge once in a while, you know?"

"I know extra time in the gym when we get back eh?"

"Yup, that's about right." Bruce took a sip of his coffee.

"Would you like tea or coffee?" Alfred asked Dick as he reached for the teapot.

"You know I think I'll go with tea. Thanks." He accepted the cup Alfred passed him.

"What time is your train?" Bruce enquired looking at his watch.

"It leaves at 9.30am." Alfred told him.

"Ok well we have time to get everything together. I'm just going to make sure I have all the documents. I reckon I should have brought Margaret with me."

"I'm sure you will manage. You know it does seem strange not having to clear away."

"Alfred, enjoy it while you can." Dick laughed. "I'm going to check I have everything I need for Oxford."

William dropped Alfred and Dick off outside Paddington Station. As they waved the car off Dick swung his rucksack onto his shoulder and picked up both suitcases.

"Its ok young man I can manage my own."

"Alfred its alright I have them. Besides it leaves you free to sort out the tickets etc. Lead on I haven't got a clue where we're going."

"Its this way." Alfred indicated as they moved off in the direction of the platforms.

"We have about twenty minutes to wait, but I would rather be a bit early" Alfred told Dick with an apologetic tone.

"No problemo. Although I don't s'pose the trains here are any more prompt than those back home."

"No I wouldn't be surprised if it was late. Anyhow we are not meeting Barbara till about five. She has lectures till then. We should get into Oxford around 11.00am, so that gives us plenty of time to get to the hotel and settle in."

"Ok. Look Alfred there's a seat you want to grab it?"

"Good idea." Alfred agreed sinking down onto the seat. Dick perched on the edge beside him.

"Its busy." He observed.

"I think it usually is." Alfred replied. "Not to worry we have reserved first class seats so there will not be a problem."

"OOH! Pushing the boat out aren't we?"

"Young Sir. If we cant indulge in some of the finer things what is the point? Its not as if it cant be afforded."

"Yeah I guess you have a point. I sometimes forget, you know, that Bruce is filthy rich. Yes I know its strange but well like I said to Bruce, the money is not what's important. I guess I just haven't really got used to the idea."

"I suppose that your parents had to be frugal. Money must have been short at times."

"It was. I know there were odd times when I ate and they didn't. I also know that everything they had was hard earned. I remember when they bought me my first bicycle for my fifth birthday and first public performance. I found out that they had saved all year and still hadn't raised enough. The whole circus clubbed together then to help them buy it for me. I was so proud of that bike. You know I think in some ways it makes you appreciate things more?"

"I know. Bruce has often commented that you never seem to ask for anything. He gets quite frustrated when its your birthday and at Christmas. When you suggested that you only bought each other a small inexpensive, but appropriate token he was a little taken aback."

"I know, because by then it wasn't as if I couldn't afford to buy something expensive. I didn't feel comfortable with all the expensive things he bought me. Don't get me wrong it was nice and I did appreciate them. I just wouldn't feel right saying 'oh can I have a top range sports car or motorbike, or some designer something or other. I would feel like I was being greedy."

Alfred contemplated Dicks face for a moment. It was clear he was being sincere.

"I know that Bruce treasures all the small things you have given him. Those things you made too." Alfred said quietly. "Although maybe he hasn't made that obvious to you."

"I know Alfred. I noticed some of them in his study when I was searching for something. He would have thrown them away if he didn't care."

"I think that's one thing you can take to the bank, although he doesn't always seem to show it he most certainly cares." Alfred patted Dicks arm.

"He shows it, when it's appropriate. I did find it difficult at first coming from a family that was so openly affectionate. At times I did question why Bruce took me in, as he didn't seem to pay me any attention, well not obviously anyway. It was when I broke down on the first anniversary of my parents death I realised he did care. I didn't understand the difficulties he was having with the media and child services and their accusations back then either."

"Yes he found that difficult. He kept all that from you to spare you the pain. Well I think that's our train. Come on."

They found their seats and settled in for the journey. Alfred laid his newspaper on the table between them. Dick gazed through the window, watching the hurried bustle of people going about their routines.

"You know young man, Bruce would look in on you every night, and actually he still does." Alfred said quietly continuing with the subject.

"I know, it took a while for me to realise but I did notice. I also realised that it was him that woke me every time I had a nightmare. Well apart from when he wasn't home. I also know he would sit in the armchair by the fire or fall asleep on the sofa, and then sneak out in the early hours, after one of those episodes. I never told him I knew, I was scared he would stop and I did find it comforting."

Alfred smiled gently. As the train began to pull out of the station he turned his attention to the newspaper. Dick pulled a pair of small headphones from his pocket and settling back in his seat pushed them into his ears. Alfred glanced up and smiled again. Dick, his eyes closed, was already tapping his fingers in time to the music on the arm of the seat.

Alfred laid the newspaper on the table and bent over it tapping his pen in frustration.

"You stuck?" Dick asked him, making him jump, as he had not been aware that Dick was taking any notice.

"I hate to admit it but I am. I have just one which seems to be eluding me."

"Go on, give me the clue. Do you have any letters in?" Dick leant forward.

"I don't think you will be able to help but anyway, the clues 'Heavenly'. I have two letters in, Y and N." Alfred turned the paper round, his pen on the space in the puzzle.

Dick studied the grid and scratched his head.

"I didn't think you would know it." Alfred began to pull the newspaper away; Dick put his hand on it to stop him.

"Hold on! Try EMPYREAN." Dick sat back as Alfred placed the letters in the grid his eyes wide with amazement.

"Well it fits, but is it the right word?" He eyed the puzzle.

"Ok let's check." Dick pulled his mobile from his pocket and began to press the buttons. "I can access the net with this, so, hang on, there we go, online thesaurus. E.M.P.Y.R.E.A.N."

He spelt out loud as he pressed the keys.

"There! Celestial, divine, HEAVENLY, spiritual, and so on. Told you so." He stabbed at the screen with his finger then sat back a huge satisfied grin on his face.

"Well I never! How did you know that?"

Dick sniffed as if he was restraining tears.

"Why is it both you and Bruce never give me any credit for intelligence? You know I think the both of you forget that, despite having never attended a school until I came to live at the manor, when I was given the entrance exam I was well in front of the others in my age group in at least all the basic subjects. I seem to remember the Head saying I was at least two years in front!"

"I'm sorry, I was just surprised that you knew that's all. I never meant to demean your intelligence."

"Ok then that's alright." He noticed that Alfred looked hurt. "Hey I wasn't getting at you, sorry, I was joking, honest."

Alfred chuckled.

"I know we sometimes seem to belittle you in that way, its just a joke too, you know how you sometimes say about Bruce being 'old'? Both of us know that in reality you are extremely clever, no, highly intelligent and also very quick to learn. I was the one who stuck your reports on the fridge remember? Although I know Bruce didn't always tell you he was, is, immensely proud of what you achieved. He was a little disappointed that you decided not to go on to University."

"Yeah, well, I had my reasons. It wasn't something I could really explain to anyone." Dick dropped his head with some embarrassment. "I just knew it wasn't right for me."

"Its alright young man I'm sure your reasons were valid."

"I wonder how Gotham is faring without us?" Dick asked eager to change the subject.

"Well I'm sure Superman has it covered."

"Huh, Bruce didn't say who he had asked to cover, I'm surprised he asked Clarke."

"Well it isn't exactly an onerous task for him. I'm sure though he will not have too much to do. Things had been pretty much cleared up by both of you before we left."

"True, true." Dick glanced out of the window as a distorted voice announced that they were approaching Oxford.

Dick stood and lifted the suitcases from the overhead rack and stood them on the table as he reached for his rucksack.

Dick and Alfred wound their way out of the station to the taxi rank. Alfred protested that Dick shouldn't be carrying all the luggage.

"Look Al' its ok. Its not as if we have far to walk and they are far too heavy for you to carry anyway. You're not getting any younger and you do enough as it is."

Alfred acquiesced, somewhat gratefully, as Dick was right they were rather heavy. He knew Dick was more than capable of managing them; his smaller stature belied his actual physical capabilities.

There was a queue, although not a long one, at the taxi rank and Alfred and Dick took their place in it.

"So what's the name of the hotel where we will be staying?" Dick asked as he shifted the luggage, as they moved towards the front of the queue.

"Bath Place Hotel. It's quite a historic place. King Edward VII is meant to have visited friends there, the author Dorothy L. Sayers lived there and Richard Burton and Liz Taylor used it as a secret rendezvous. I understand that it was originally built by Flemish weavers in the seventeenth century"

"Boy, that's old." Dick chuckled, as they took up their place at the front of the queue.

After a couple of minutes a cab drew up and Dick assisted the driver in stowing the luggage in the boot, as he assured Dick the trunk was called 'over here'.

He climbed into the back seat and Alfred, having already got on board, gave the address and the cab pulled away.

From the outside the hotel didn't look that impressive, the entrance being from a small courtyard but once inside both Dick and Alfred where impressed by its lavish interior. They were shown to a room on the first floor, which had two sumptuous looking beds. Although the room was small it had its own en-suite bathroom.

Dick dropped the two suitcases on the floor between the beds and swung his rucksack onto one of the beds.

He moved to the window and pushed the crisp white net to one side surveying the view. The window overlooked the courtyard.

"Its awfully quiet." He commented as he turned and sat on one of the beds. "But that's actually quite nice."

"I agree young man, nothing worse than a hotel where the hustle and bustle of the outside intrudes. Are you taking that bed?"

"I can do, I have no preference, do you?"

"None at all. Lets get our things unpacked and see if we can get some tea, and a snack. Then maybe we can have an amble around to get the lie of the land before we meet up with Barbara."

"That sounds good to me." Dick stood up and lifted one of the cases onto the bed, he turned and did the same with the other."

"Thank you."

Having unpacked they made their way down to the dining room where they enjoyed as Alfred put it 'a perfect cup of English tea' and some sandwiches, before heading out to see the sights.

They found a seat in the window so they could watch to see Barbara when she arrived. The dinnertime rush had gone and so far the Turf Tavern was reasonably quiet. Alfred went to the bar and returned with two pints of beer.

"There you go young man, that's what they call 'real ale'." He said as he took a long pull on his and smacked his lips appreciatively.

Dick eyed the glass suspiciously. He wasn't used to this. He lifted the glass to his lips and took a tentative sip. His eyes widened with appreciation.

"Hmm, that's not bad." He nodded.

"Well when in Rome… as they say. I hope you don't develop too much of a taste for drink!"

"Nah, I guess its nice for a change and to at least be legal but, you know I don't feel the urge to go overboard."

"Good, good. Its your round next though."

"Oh right. Is it? Ok only kidding, only kidding." He added as Alfred's face showed the 'I'm taking no nonsense' look.

Alfred glanced at his watch.

"Its almost five. Barbara shouldn't be long."

"I bet you're getting quite excited about seeing her."

"I am. Apart from my brother, who I never see, she is the only real relative I have."

Dick nodded and turned to gaze out of the window.

"She's coming I can see her, look." He announced turning back.

Barbara breezed in through the door; she stood for a couple of moments letting her eyes adjust to the change in the light. As she scanned the room she noticed Alfred and Dick waving to her.

"UNCLE ALFRED!" she shrieked as she flew across the room. Alfred jumped up and caught her in his arms, hugging her tight. Dick stood up; he couldn't help but grin at this open display of affection.

After what seemed like an age Barbara stepped back still holding on to Alfred's arms.

"It is so good to see you. You look so well." She leaned in and kissed him again. Looking over Alfred's shoulder she beamed at Dick.

"Come here you." She stepped around Alfred and threw her arms around Dick's neck hugging him and kissing him.

"Hmmmm you feel so good." She murmured in his ear, kissing him again. "I never thought I would have missed seeing you quite as much."

"You too." Dick returned the compliment, kissing her on the cheek and hugging her close.

They drew apart and Barbara settled herself into a seat between the two of them.

"Would you like a drink before we order a meal?"

"Ooh yes please Uncle Alfred, I'm absolutely gasping."

"I'll get it." Dick offered. "What would you like?" he stood up.

"I'll have a half of lager please. Fosters. In fact no make that a pint of lager shandy, I really am thirsty."

Alfred raised an eyebrow at the request.

"I know, its not ladylike to drink in pints, but believe you me we all do it these days."

Dick chuckled as he went across to the bar to fill Barbara's order.

"You are looking very well, I must say." Barbara commented sitting back in her seat and looking at her Uncle. "Dick looks good too, I take it he has no lasting effects from his last brush with death." She smiled

"Well he is back on form, but I would have hardly called it a brush with death, although his injuries were severe."

"As I read it, he was saved just in the nick of time, or it would have been curtains for him."

"Is that what he told you?" Alfred asked gently.

"No he never really elaborated on the situation, but Bruce told me."

"Yes it was a close call, and true he doesn't really talk about it much. I think it was all a bit too traumatic. Anyway he is fighting fit now."

"Good. You know I never dreamed I would be so worried about him. I must be going soft." Barbara giggled.

"I always suspected you had a soft spot for him." Alfred winked at her. Barbara blushed and dropped her head. Dick leant over and placed her drink on the table in front of her.

"You ok? He asked with a mildly puzzled questioning expression on his face.

"Barbara was just saying…"

"Uncle Alfred! No!" Barbara interrupted him waving her hand franticly.

"That you have a soft spot for me." Dick finished off what Alfred was about to say. He grinned broadly as he resumed his seat.

"How? Oh never mind." She blushed again shaking her head. She took a long drink of her shandy.

"Its alright I wont tell anyone." Dick placed his hands across his heart. "Promise."

Barbara slapped him across the top of his arm.

"You!" she cried feigning exasperation.

"Ouch! What was that for?"

"Oh good back to normal." Alfred quipped taking a drink from his pint.

The three of them laughed.

"Ok lets have a look at the menu, I'm getting rather hungry, and I dare say Dick is too." Alfred suggested as he picked a menu from the rack on the table. Dick picked up a second and he and Barbara perused it together.

"Ok I'm going to go for the beef in ale pie. You?" Alfred announced

"I'm going to have the Hunters chicken, I'm ravenous." Barbara decided.

"Dick?"

"Well I couldn't come to England and not try the fish and chips could I?"

"Ok I'll go order. We can order a sweet after if we still have room. No put your wallet away, this ones 'on expenses' so to speak." Alfred stood and headed for the bar.

The meal was exceptionally good and they sat back replete, savouring their last dregs of coffee.

"So what's the plan for the rest of the evening?" Dick asked.

"Well, I have to say I am beginning to get a little tired." Alfred admitted. "I would appreciate going back to the hotel and having a lie down."

"What about you Dick?" Barbara asked.

"Well I'm ok. I mean I have no idea what's to do, so whatever you suggest."

"Ok, tell you what. Alfred you go have your lie down and Dick you come back to my place. I'll invite some of my mates round; they have said they would like to meet you. That's if you would like. We could maybe go on to a club later?"

Dick looked at Alfred.

"That sound like a good idea. I would welcome the rest. Its up to you though young man."

"I like the sounds of that. I will need to get changed though."

"Well look, I'll come back to the hotel with you both, Dick you can get a change of clothes and stuff and get ready at my place." Barbara suggested. "You know, thinking about it, if we go to a club it could be late before we get out, so instead of disturbing Uncle Alfred you could stay over at mine too." She added.

"Alfred?"

"That's alright by me. I have no problems with having some time to myself. Just behave yourself." Alfred wagged a finger at Dick.

"Moi? Alfred honestly. When did I ever not behave myself? Besides, Barbara will make sure I do, wont you?"

"You bet sunshine." She nodded vigorously.

Alfred wagged his finger again.

"There's always a first time for everything." He laughed. "Now, you young 'uns go have a good time."

Dick slipped into the room trying to be quiet in case Alfred was still in bed. In fact Alfred was not in the room. A note on Dick's bed directed him to the dining room where he found Alfred sat with a pot of tea at his elbow and the newspaper inevitably opened at the crossword.

"Good morning Alfred." Dick greeted.

"Good morning young man. Did you have a good evening?" Alfred put his pen down on top of the paper.

"Yes, it was great. Is there any tea left in that pot?"

"There is but let me order some more this is probably stewed."

Dick sat in the seat opposite Alfred.

"Barbara said she will meet us later about eleven, she has a few things to do this morning." Dick leaned forward putting his elbows on the table and resting his head in his folded hands.

"That's ok. Erm you want any breakfast with this tea?" Alfred raised his eyebrows with the question.

Dick studied the question, wrinkling his face as he decided. Alfred waited his eyes widening.

"Oh why not, I only had a couple of slices of toast at Barbara's."

Alfred caught the waitress's eye and beckoned her over.

"Could we have some more tea and." Alfred looked at Dick

"I'll have the full English please." Dick added.

The waitress disappeared to fill the order.

"You will certainly need extra time in the gym when we get back home at this rate." Alfred cachinnated.

Dick threw him a black look.

The waitress returned with his order and he sat back as she placed the plate in front of him.

'_I'll just get you your tea Sir.' _She told them as she disappeared again.

Dick began to eat with relish. He had a healthy appetite normally but he most certainly had developed a bigger one since arriving in the U.K.

Alfred poured him a cup of tea from the fresh pot the waitress had brought. He added a spot of milk and pushed it towards Dick, then returned his attentions back to the crossword.

"Need a hand again with that?" Dick gestured with his knife.

"Not yet thank you."

Dick chuckled

"Just asking."

They sat in silence for a while, Alfred writing the answers in the grid and Dick demolishing his breakfast.

Pushing his plate aside Dick took a drink of his tea and then topped the cup up again.

"Do you think that will manage you till dinner?" Alfred asked with humorous sarcasm.

"I think so." Dick nodded. "So what are we going to do when Bab's gets here?" he asked leaning back and giving a small stretch.

"I was hoping we could go and have a look around the town. Maybe do some souvenir shopping. There is a book I would like to try and get for myself, hopefully a first edition, so I would like to pop into a bookshop or two."

"Ok, I don't mind. I said I would send postcards to the gang. I thought I would take them each a small gift back from the places we visit."

"That would be nice. I had thought I would get Leslie a little something too."

"You still chasing her? I didn't think you still saw each other, well not unless she was visiting me." Dick laughed

"Young man my private affairs are just that, private, but since you ask Dr Thompkins and I do still enjoy each others company from time to time."

"Sorry." Dick looked somewhat abashed at having intruded. Both he and Bruce would never dream of questioning Alfred on what he got up to on his days off. Equally so Alfred was never forthcoming about his activities either, although his affections for the Doctor were obvious to both of them.

"That quite alright." Alfred accepted the apology a little sheepishly realising he had been rather unnecessarily curt. "Why don't you go and get changed and meet me back here. It should be almost time for Barbara to arrive by then."

Dick rose to comply.

"Oh I'm sorry, I forgot to say. Bruce called he will not be meeting us till tomorrow lunchtime now as the 'negotiations' are taking a little longer than hoped. I have managed to procure the room for another night."

Dick halted in his tracks and turned back.

"I hope its all going ok?" He asked looking concerned.

"He assures me it is but they want to cross the T's and dot the I's and just go over the small print in a little more detail. The contract is worth a lot to them and I can understand they want to get the details right."

"I guess you can't blame them for being cautious. I know Bruce has rescued several small companies that have been ripped off by large corporations in the past, but this is the first over here isn't it?" Alfred nodded. "Ok I'll see you in a bit."

"Yes, I think I'll have another cuppa."

"Alfred, we will be having a tour of Oxfords public conveniences at this rate!" Dick chuckled as he turned and headed off to change.

Alfred was still nursing a cup of tea when Dick returned.

"That was quick!" he observed.

"Well I did shower at Bab's so I just needed to change clothes."

"Hmm. I was remiss to inquire as to how your evening went, other than to ask in general terms. I hope it was a good evening."

Dick sat in the seat he had vacated earlier.

"It was alright. I mean her friends were a bit pompous. Well they did try to be. I'm not sure if it was the fact that they knew I live with a billionaire or what. Anyway apart from one guy, James, I got on ok with them in the end."

"What was wrong with James?" Alfred asked inclining his head slightly.

"Well he was trying to show how clever he was all the time. Kept dropping into computer jargon all the time, you know? Anyway after a bit Bab's pulled him up for it, telling him about the new system we have been playing with at Wayne Tech. I just gave him a small taste of the spec and he was like, no way, at first. Bab's told him that I had access to some really cool stuff and although I wasn't at university not to underestimate my abilities. He was a bit quiet after that"

Alfred smiled.

"I'm not sure what's got into Barbara she is being too nice to me." Dick shook his head at the thought.

"I wouldn't knock it if I was you." Alfred smiled, "I'm sure she has a great deal of affection for you, she just doesn't show it, well not often and not to you. I think the fact that she thought you had died, then after you were badly beaten it has made her feel a bit 'protective' towards you. She does see you as family, as a brother."

"I know. I guess she is like the sister I never had. I had to laugh 'cos she kept telling me about her girlfriends and how they were envious of her knowing me and Bruce."

"How come?"

Dick coloured slightly.

"Well… They apparently keep on saying that she's lucky having got so close to us as they think Bruce and I are 'hot' amongst other things! Bab's has a picture of you Bruce and I on her mantle piece and others on her computer. She says her girlfriends keep drooling over them and asking for a copies!"

"Oh I say!" Alfred exclaimed with mock surprise. "Its not as if either of you are particularly good looking or anything is it? I mean as if being billed in the press as 'Gotham's most eligible bachelor's, along with words like handsome, hot stuff, gorgeous, dreamy, and such like, wouldn't give you a clue to how women see the pair of you."

Dick dropped his head bashfully.

"You should check out the fan sites that are on the Internet dedicated to you and Bruce."

"I did once or twice but it was embarrassing and some of the suggestions about what they would like to do with us both. Well!"

"I would have thought that a young man like you would have liked all of that. I know Bruce says that he gets a bit tired of all the attention at times, partly because he is not sure if its him or his money they like."

"I guess its good for your ego, but I never really see myself as all those things they say."

"What single or good looking?" Alfred grinned.

"Well I am definitely single right now, although I hope to remedy that once we get home, but as for good looking, well?"

"I am reliably informed the later is more than true." Alfred assured him. "Have you a particular lady lined up then?"

Dick tapped the side of his nose again.

"Oh yes, that's if I can, a, get the courage up to ask her and, b, she is willing. I have to admit I have been eyeing her up for a while."

"She must be someone special. Oh look there's Barbara." Alfred waved her over. She sank into the seat next to Alfred.

"You two ready to hit the town shopping?"

"You bet." Dick laughed

"You know Uncle Alfred I don't know where this guy gets his energy from, I mean we danced most of the night and it was late, well early, when we finally got to bed. Then he's up at the crack of dawn! What are you feeding him?"

"Oh its par for the course with him." Alfred smiled. "I take it that the evening was a good one."

"Oh yes. It was fun and we had a laugh. Mind you I had trouble prising my girlfriends away from him."

Alfred raised his eyebrows. "Really!"

"Yes really. I'm not kidding you they were like moths round a flame. There were other girls in the club couldn't take their eyes off him either."

"Don't you start on that too, I've had enough of Alfred's teasing."

"Sorry. But it was true." Barbara insisted.

"Yeah, yeah. Ok come on let's get going." Dick urged anxious to change the subject.

Barbara rose along with Alfred and then held out a hand to Dick, who took it. She tugged him from his seat. As Alfred moved towards the exit she slid an arm around Dick's waist to impede his path.

"I'm only going to say this once, ok?" She whispered in his ear. "You are all the girls have said and more. Yes you are gorgeous, dishy, to die for, and so on. It's the fact that you don't seem to see it that's the best part. I am privileged to be able to be associated with you. Bruce too, he's hot stuff as well." She asserted quietly. "Ok I may not have romantic inclinations towards you, but I love you to bits. OK?"

She kissed him on the cheek then hurried after Alfred. Dick stood not quite knowing what to do. Alfred had told him of Barbara's feelings but for her to tell him in such a way was unexpected.

"Hey wait for me!" he called out as he hurried after them.

William helped them load their cases into the boot of the Rolls.

"How'd it go?" Dick asked Bruce as he slid into the back seat beside him. Bruce hesitated as Alfred climbed into the car and settled himself into his seat.

"It was a success." He announced. "Everything's signed and sealed satisfactorily. I think they will have a great deal of work coming their way in a short time."

"I was a bit worried when Alfred said you were delayed." Dick told him. "Barbara was sad she didn't get to see you."

The car began to pull away.

"Oh it was just them being, understandably, cautious. It's a big step being taken over by a 'foreign' company, especially one as large as ours. They just wanted to ensure that their staff were safe etc. In fact it was that that made me, what would you say? Warm to them? In fact I actually got on rather well with their head guy. I'm sad I missed Barbara though."

"That's good." Alfred commented. "About the business that is."

"Ok that's all the business I'm going to discuss from now on. This is the start of my vacation and I have no intention of spoiling it. You two have got a head start."

He playfully poked Dick in the ribs.

Dick was about to retaliate when Alfred warned them in his most serious voice.

"Now then boys, lets not have any messing around."

Bruce and Dick collapsed into peals of laughter, hugging each other playfully.

"Now now." He warned wagging his finger at them. "I hope you two will behave when you are left to your own devises."

"Oh yes, I'm sure Nottingham will not know what hit it." Bruce laughed.

"William would you drop Alfred off at his friends and then Dick and I at our hotel." Bruce told William as they neared their destination. "I have booked a self drive car for the next couple of days, now you are sure that you have somewhere to stay until we need you again?" Bruce asked with some concern. "I don't have a problem booking you a room."

"Oh yes Sir, there's no problem whatsoever. I have my usual haunts, so to speak. I have to say there's not many who would pay me for the whole time even when I'm not driving." William assured him. "Although if Alfred and his friends would like to avail themselves of my services then they have only got to call me."

"That very generous of you William." Alfred said appreciatively. "I might just call you. Although maybe you would like to join us for a drink instead?"

"Now that sounds like a good idea, but I wouldn't want to intrude."

"I'm sure that wouldn't be the case, but I will ask my friends and call you all the same."

"Thank you Sir."

"If you have any problems whatsoever you be sure to call me at our hotel." Bruce insisted.

"I will Sir I will."

Alfred leaned forward to give William directions as to the address where he was to meet his friend. With practised ease he pulled up at the kerb.

Alfred got out the car and went to knock on the door. A tall distinguished looking, grey haired man came out and greeted Alfred warmly.

Alfred introduced him to Bruce and Dick as William offloaded Alfred's suitcases. The pleasantries over and done with, Bruce and Dick bade farewell to Alfred as William pulled away.

"It will seem odd not having him around" Dick commented as he waved through the back window.

"I know." Bruce chuckled. "Although Alfred doesn't seem to think you and I can manage on our own sometimes."

"Oh I'm sure we will." Dick grinned. "Besides I'm here to look after you."

"What! Ooh you; just you wait young man. I'm keeping a list and I'll make sure I get my own back when you least expect it." Bruce warned him grinning back.

"Oh yes and what do you think you are going to do?"

"Oh I'll think of something don't you worry." Bruce warned him.

"Oh I'm so scared."

"You had better be afraid, very afraid." Bruce laughed.

Dick pretended to shiver with fear. Bruce slapped him across the arm playfully.

"You have the directions for the hotel?" Bruce asked William leaning forward.

"Yes Sir. A52 Grantham road to Holme Pierrpoint then it's signed to Cropwell Bishop, and Langar."

"Very good." Bruce settled back.

"So what's this Hotel we are staying at?" Dick asked him.

"Its called Langar Hall. It was a toss up between that and a Hotel in Nottingham itself. Langar got chosen as it had some very good reviews." Bruce explained. "As I understand it, it was built in 1837, but its beauty is its quiet location. What was it? Oh yes. 'Once in a blue moon it is still possible to come across a country house that makes one want to jump for joy'. Well that's what it said in the Times. I have to say it does look very comfortable. Oh and guess what."

"What?" Dick eyed him with suspicion.

"I've even booked you a room of your own this time."

"Ooh goody." Dick laughed.

"I know it wasn't very fair you having to share before." Bruce pointed out.

"Hey I'm not complaining. I know they didn't have any other rooms available at the time. It was cool with me. I would have understood if I had to share with you, you know."

"It's not the case here, but its not that I would have objected either."

"So what are we going to pass the time doing?" Dick asked as he gazed out of the window at the passing countryside.

"Well, we can have a look round Nottingham itself, then there is a plethora of attractions, apart from the castle. Then there's the Sherwood Forest centre and loads more. I have a guide book, we can have a browse after dinner and decide then."

"Ok that's sounds good to me. Hmm Sherwood Forest heh? Robin Hood and all that. My old circus costume was meant to have been designed around his outfit."

"So I understand. You should have brought it you would have fitted right in." Bruce grinned.

"Hmmm.!" Dick looked at Bruce through furrowed eyebrows.

Dick stood surveying the entrance as Bruce busied himself with checking in. It certainly looked pleasant enough. The stone flagged floor and pale yellow walls reflected the light that came through the large windows.

"Our suitcases have been sent up already. I said we would find our own way." Bruce told him as he came up behind him.

"Here's your key, your in room 204, I'm in 202 the 'Brownlow' suite. Come on they're this way." Bruce nodded his head in the direction they had to go.

"Ok. We going to do anything today?" Dick asked as they climbed the staircase.

"Well I thought it would be nice to chill out for the rest of today. We could have a walk around the grounds, have a quiet drink before dinner and plan what we want to do. We don't get many opportunities to relax so I feel we should take the chance whilst we can."

I agree. Although I think we will just have managed to relax and it will be time to go back."

"You could be right." Bruce agreed. Ok here's my room. I'm going to have a shower and change. Meet you in the lounge in." Bruce looked at his watch. "Shall we say an hour?"

Dick checked his watch too.

"Ok that's fine."

Bruce unlocked the door to his room as Dick continued on to find his.

He stood in front of the door and a grin spread across his face. He shook his head as he unlocked the door and stepped into the room. He found himself in a pleasantly airy room, with flowery wallpaper and dark furniture. His suitcases were sat on the trestle at the end of the large bed. He continued to chuckle to himself as he unpacked.

Bruce was waiting for him when he arrived in the lounge.

"Your room alright?" He asked.

"Yes thank you. It's very comfortable." Dick answered trying hard not to grin, but failing miserably.

"Something funny?" Bruce enquired looking puzzled.

"Oh Like you didn't know."

"I'm sorry, I'm sure I don't know." Bruce insisted.

"My room, did you book that one on purpose?"

"I just asked for a room for myself and one for my son why?"

"Oh so that's why my room is called 'The Nursery'!"

"What!" Bruce looked incredulous.

"I don't believe you didn't know."

"Ok. OK I admit I did know when we checked in but honestly not before. Does it matter?"

"No it just, well it just amused me that's all."

"I guess it is rather funny. At least it hasn't got a crib instead of a bed." Bruce chuckled.

"Yer right funny."

"I will have to ask if they do babysitting services as well." Bruce laughed

"Watch it." Dick warned with mock menace. "You can go off someone."

"Ok. I've got the guide lets have a look see." Bruce waved the book, changing the subject.

Bruce and Dick were up bright and early. After a hearty breakfast they set out for their first destination.

"You know where to go?" Dick asked as they drove out of the hotel grounds.

"I reckon so. Anyway getting lost is part of the fun."

"Aren't you going to use the Sat Nav?"

"Nope."

"Oh okay."

"There's the map, you navigate."

"Oh right then you can blame me when you don't listen and do get lost."

"Something like that. Why don't you see what's on the radio? There must be something."

Dick flicked the switch and pressed the 'search' button. Eventually he found a song playing that he recognised and left it on that station.

He opened the map and studied it glancing at the signs as they passed them to ascertain their current location.

"It does seem odd driving on the opposite side of the road." He commented. "Is it strange for you?"

"Well at first but I'm getting used to it now." Bruce told him. "But I need to concentrate at the moment."

Dick settled back to watch the countryside flash by. Signs with strange sounding place names came and went.

Eventually they came upon the sign pointing to Edwinstowe. Bruce navigated the narrow roads and turned in the sign posted direction of the visitor centre. Their destination was not too far down a road with trees on one side.

Bruce found a parking space and they alighted from the car. Dick retrieved the small rucksack he had put on the rear seat and swung it onto his shoulders as Bruce made sure the car was locked.

They both stood for a moment ascertaining the direction they should go.

"I think its this way." Bruce pointed in the direction several people appeared to be heading.

They walked the short distance to a set of open gates and the main hub of the visitor centre.

"Ok shall we peruse the amenities here first or shall we take to the trail?"

"Shall we go and look at the Robin Hood exhibition first? Then at least we have some background to go on. You know the real legend and all that."

"Sounds good to me." Bruce agreed.

They emerged from the exhibition suitably enlightened and set off down the path through the forest.

The verdant trees offered a welcome shade from the bright sun. The air was thick with the scents of wood and flowers.

At intervals along the path there were information points giving details of the various types of flora and fauna that could be found in the ancient woodland.

"You know it's surprisingly quiet." Dick noticed. "And yet there seems to be a lot of people around. From all over the world by the sounds of it too." He had so far recognised Japanese, German, French and various American dialects from passing groups.

"I know its amazing. Shh look." Bruce put his hand on Dick's shoulder to halt him and pointed into the forest.

Pair of squirrels cavorted on the floor, darting now and then up one of the trees.

Bruce and Dick stood for a moment or two watching. As they stood they became aware of an odd sound.

"I think that's a woodpecker." Bruce breathed quietly.

They continued on down the path, Dick a little way in front.

"Hey! At least you will be at home here." He called back having stopped at an information board.

"And why would that be?" Bruce asked as he caught up.

"Look, they have several species of bat here." Dick laughed. "I bet they won't add you to their tally."

Bruce laughed. "I bet they won't."

Still chuckling they both continued along the downward sloping path, following it round to the left it levelled out before beginning a gentle rise.

The tree lined aisle opened out, a grassy clearing on the right. They caught their first glimpse of the ancient oak. It stood in a clearing surrounded by a fence.

"Wow!" Dick exclaimed. "I never expected it to look so, so alive."

"It is amazing considering it's meant to be at least 800 years old."

Dick took out his camera and began to shoot some film. Bruce ambled over to a nearby vacant bench and sat down. Dick came over and joined him. He fished around in the rucksack and produced a couple of bottles of water, one of which he handed to Bruce.

"Thanks" Bruce drank deeply.

They sat drinking and watching the passing tourists, enjoying the warm sun. A large dog galloped up and made a fuss of Dick, before reluctantly returning to its owner.

Bruce checked his watch.

"We had better get going, if we are going to get some more sightseeing in today. Do you want to visit the gift shop?"

"No I reckon we will be able to get souvenirs from most places."

"Come on then let's get back to the car."

They walked the short distance back to the car park and the car.

"So where was it we were going next?" Dick asked as he belted himself in.

"Hardwick Hall. I reckon though it will be about lunchtime by the time we get there and I am reliably informed that the Hardwick Inn is worth a visit and has excellent food. So I think we should head there first before we explore the Hall."

"Now that sounds good to me." Dick acceded approvingly.

Bruce pulled the car into a space outside the Hardwick Inn, after having made several wrong turns trying to find it, much to Dick's amusement.

There were a few cars parked around the grassy circle at the front. The long sandstone building definitely looked ancient, it having been built in the fifteenth Century. It almost felt like they were stepping back in time as they crossed the threshold into the Inn.

Finding a suitable table Bruce and Dick perused the menu. They both decided on the speciality mixed grill. Bruce noted the table number and went to order.

He came back with two glasses. He placed one in front of Dick.

"I'm only having a soft drink seeing as how I am driving." He said as Dick took a sip of his drink. "Is that ok?" Dick nodded. "I wasn't sure what beer you wanted in that 'shandy'.

Dick wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"Its fine. It's a pity I can't do some of the driving."

"You can. What made you think you couldn't?"

"I dunno? I just thought you had to have a special license or something."

"No, I understand our U.S. licenses are ok for about a year. I just thought I would drive today."

"Ok." Dick took a pull on his drink again.

A young girl placed a tablemat and cutlery in front of each of them.

"Would you like any sauces with your meal?" She asked politely.

"Could we have some mustard." Bruce asked looking at Dick for confirmation. Dick nodded his assent.

"English or French?" She asked.

"English I think." Bruce decided. Dick again nodded his approval as the girl went back.

The girl returned with the condiments and a small bowl of dark yellow mustard.

After a brief wait their meal arrived.

Dick looked at the plate.

"Boy this looks good."

"Doesn't it. Oh by the way I asked them to hold the black pudding. I know you are not struck on it, and I certainly have never developed a taste for it."

"I'm glad you did I don't know how they got all this on the plate as it is."

The grill consisted of, rump steak, a lamb cutlet, gammon steak, lambs liver, pork steak, a sausage, mushrooms, tomato and battered onion rings. The whole thing was topped off with a fried egg. The inevitable 'chips' were a final flourish.

They ate in silence, savouring each mouthful, eventual laying their cutlery down on their empty plates.

"Now that was excellent." Bruce said rubbing his stomach.

"Mmm." Dick was still chewing the last of his meat.

"You want a dessert?"

"Goodness no way." Dick said as he swallowed. "I don't think I could eat another thing. A coffee would be nice though."

"I agree." Bruce rose to go place their beverage order.

"We will have to work this off, although I could just curl up and sleep now." Dick grinned as Bruce sat back down.

"Well we can walk up to the hall from here. It saves driving all the way around. They said at the bar that it's quite a pleasant walk."

Dick groaned.

They lingered over their coffees, letting their meal digest before they set of to the Hall.

The walk was indeed a pleasant one; the gently sloping path meandered up the grassy banks. Sheep grazed in clumps on either side or stood and gazed at them still chewing. As the reached the top of the rise they could see the waters of the man made lakes glinting in the near distance.

"From what I've read the woman who was instrumental in having this house built was a formidable force." Bruce told Dick as the house came into view.

"Really?" Dick said with an air of 'do tell'.

"Yes, in fact she ended up as one of the wealthiest and powerful women in England at the time."

"Go on, I'm sure you are going to give me a history lesson."

"Not if you are not interested." Bruce said sounding a little miffed.

"No no. I am. Honest carry on." Dick insisted.

"Sure?"

"Yes."

Bruce gathered himself ready to pass on the information he had gleaned from the guide books. Being possessed of a somewhat eidetic memory he was able to recall and relate seemingly trivial facts accurately.

"Well Bess of Hardwick was born in 1527 and died in 1608. It seems she was born into impoverished circumstances, her father dying before she was a year old."

"Oh dear. Hang on lets go sit on the grass over there whilst you impart this knowledge." Dick suggested.

They found a suitable spot and settled down. The sun was warm and the slight breeze made it extremely pleasant.

"Go on." Dick urged.

"Ok where was I." Bruce pondered. "Oh yes. Well she was widowed by the age 13, outlived four Monarchs and actually married three more times. She was the founder of dynasties that still wield power today.

She survived rumours that she murdered one of her husbands and an attempt to poison her. She served two terms of imprisonment in the tower of London, one being seven months in 1561 for an involvement with Lady Jane Grey."

"Wow, she was some women." Dick said with genuine amazement.

"Her Granddaughter Arabella was actually in line for the throne. Anyway she had this Hall Built between 1591 and 1597. There is a popular rhyme that says 'Hardwick Hall more glass than wall'. I guess you can see what was meant by that just by looking." Bruce swept his arm in the direction of the House.

"The windows, although they look as if they should illuminate only one room actually light two rooms on two stories. Some are actually false windows enclosing chimney pieces."

"Was that to avoid the tax on chimneys?" Dick asked him.

"No that didn't come into force till1662, although I suppose it did help when it was introduced. Don't forget glass was a very expensive commodity back then so it readily displayed her wealth."

"She wouldn't have been a woman to get on the wrong side of. She certainly would have given you a run for your money."

Bruce laughed

"No doubt. She would most certainly have tried to marry one of her offspring off to you or even me; although I think she had her sights set on royalty. Anyway you ready for a look around?"

"OK. It's certainly fascinating. Shall we take a gander at the Old Hall first?"

"Why not."

They emerged from the hall blinking in the sunlight and made their way back down the winding road and the Hardwick Inn where they had left the hire car.

"Do you fancy a drink before we set off back?" Bruce enquired. "I know I'm quite thirsty."

"Ok that sounds a nice idea." Dick agreed.

Reaching the Inn they decided that they would sit outside to enjoy their drinks. Dick went to fetch them.

He returned with two large glasses of cola.

They sat quietly enjoying the early evening sun. The venue was in deed proving to be a popular one as the car park was soon filling up with cars bringing families and couples to drink and dine.

Dick collected both glasses and returned them to the bar. Bruce went to the car and turned the engine over ready.

Dick climbed into the passenger seat, having firstly gone to the wrong door. Giggling.

"I will probably just get used to this when we are heading back." He laughed shaking his head.

Bruce just laughed as he pulled away from the car park.

"We should just get back in time to shower and change in time for dinner."

"That's if you don't get lost on the way back."

"Have I ever?"

"Always a first time." Dick switched on the radio. It was the same local commercial radio they had been listening to on their outward journey.

After a couple of songs the presenter announced.

'_Mansfield103.2 has just had a text message asking for a dedication to be played. It would seem that we have two visitors over from the States who are listening in, in their car right now. So Bruce and Dick I hope you are listening and that you are having a great time. I'm told you will understand the meaning behind this next record. Meatloaf and 'Bat out of Hell'."_

The song faded in.

"What!? Did I hear that right? How on earth?"

He noticed Dick's wide grin.

"I texted then when you went to the bathroom. I thought it would be a laugh."

"Hmm good choice of record." Bruce laughed back nodding.

They drove the rest of the way back in relative silence. Dick now and then joining in with the songs and to his amazement Bruce also joined in now and then, tapping the steering wheel in time to the music.

Bruce and Dick enjoyed a leisurely evening meal of home made vegetable soup, followed by veal served with garden vegetables and new potatoes.

They treated themselves to a dessert, Dick choosing a roast peach with raspberries and ice cream, and Bruce to a summer fruits Pavlova.

To finish off they explored the cheese board, which held a selection of local cheeses, along with coffee.

They had shared a bottle of Château Laulan Médoc with the meal, which had proved to be excellent.

Finally replete they made their way to their respective rooms, arranging to meet up again for an early breakfast.

Dick threw himself on the bed and switched on the TV, flicking through the channels he found nothing that interested him, so he went to the bathroom, went through his night time ablutions and returned to get into bed, falling asleep almost as soon as his head touched the pillow.

Bruce was similarly occupied and he too was soon asleep.

Both Bruce and Dick were awake before the alarm roused them. They met up in the breakfast room.

"You sleep well?" Bruce inquired.

Dick yawned and stretched languidly.

"Yup, sure did. In fact better than I have in ages."

Bruce smiled

"Me too, it must be something in the air."

"That or the fact that we don't have to worry about a call out in the middle of the night." Dick pointed out.

"You may have a good point there. I think we have actually been able to relax for once."

"So it's Nottingham city today then?"

"Yes. I think a bit of retail therapy and then a look around some of the tourist attractions. Naturally Nottingham Castle is a must." Bruce asserted. I understand that there are caves too."

"Ok sounds good to me." Dick nodded his approval.

"Oh and then tonight I thought we would have an early dinner as I have a surprise treat in stall for you."

"What?"

"It wouldn't be a surprise if I told you would it." Bruce grinned.

"But, But."

"No I'm not telling you. It's a bit of a treat for me too. I couldn't resist it."

"Huh, now I'm going to be wondering all day. You rotter."

Bruce just laughed.

"Come on lets get our breakfast or we'll never get anywhere."

"Ok we are going to find a park and ride site and then travel in on a tram." Bruce announced as they started off. "I'm told it will be easier as parking in Nottingham itself is horrendous."

"Ok."

"We are going to have a bit of a detour first though. I hope you don't mind."

"Why where are we going?"

"It's another surprise. It's about 40mins drive. Then it's only about 20mins back to the park and ride site."

"When did you decide on this?"

"I was having a look at the guides this morning and I noticed this place. Anyway don't you like surprises?"

"Well." Dick said with some hesitation, drawing the words out slowly. "Yes but two in one day!"

"Aint you lucky?"

"Hmm, I suppose but it depends on the surprises."

Bruce glanced across and laughed.

"Oh I think this first one will amuse you."

Dick eased himself back in his seat and adjusted the seat belt. He gazed out at the passing countryside trying to get a clue as to their destination from the road signs. Bruce appeared to know exactly what route to take.

Place names such as Stanton on the Wolds and Plumtree came and went.

Dick flicked the radio on. The station they had listened to the previous day couldn't be picked up so he tuned in to another.

Bruce was concentrating on the driving so he didn't bother talking to him so as not distract him.

He redirected his gaze out of the window.

"Hey hang on, did I read that sign right?" he said straining his neck to try and see the sign.

"Why what did you see?" Bruce grinned

"I'm sure it said, no, it can't have."

"What did you think you saw?"

"I'm sure that sign said Gotham!"

"Did it! Really."

Dick turned to look at Bruce trying to ascertain if he was joking. Bruce was grinning. Dick turned his attention back to the road watching for further signs.

"There!" Dick pointed. "I thought so. Gotham. I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me."

Bruce chuckled.

"Oh come on surely not."

"Bruce!"

"Ok, yes there is a Gotham here. Although it's pronounced Goat Ham."

"I guess that's our destination then."

"Yep. I thought it was interesting."

"And I suppose you're going to tell me all about it."

"Why don't you want to know?"

"Er well yes."

"Ok let's find somewhere to park up and then I'll give you the potted version."

They found a suitable spot and Bruce pulled in.

"Ok. Well, Gotham or 'Go tam' as it's pronounced, is a Saxon name and means 'Home of Goats'."

"Oo er!"

"The village has links with New York and President Clinton, who is thought to have had ancestors from here.

Their main claim to fame though is the 'Merrie Tales of the mad men of Gotham', which date from the 16th Century."

"What?"

"Although the reasons are not known for sure and there are various stories behind them, the tales involve the men allegedly trying to drown an eel in a pond, burning down a forge to rid it of a wasps nest and building a hedge around a cuckoo's nest, oh and rolling cheese down hill to make its own way to Nottingham."

"Definitely crazy then?"

"Well no. The reason they did those things was because King John was planning to come through the village on his way to Nottingham and it was thought that his route would automatically become a public highway. It was thought back then that madness was contagious and so in order to keep King John away they feigned madness. The reason being they couldn't afford the upkeep of a public road."

Oh so there was method in their madness then." Dick chuckled.

"Definitely." Bruce laughed in agreement.

"I wonder if they are aware of our Gotham."

"Well I heard a rumour that they do and they mention a couple of odd characters called Batman and Robin, but of course they have dismissed it as just an urban legend."

Dick laughed

"Well wouldn't you?"

"Hmm I guess so in the circumstances. Anyway do you want a quick look around or shall we go straight on to Nottingham?"

"Well maybe we could see if we can get some postcards of the place. I think the guys back home would find it kinda neat."

"Good idea. I think I saw a post office and a general store we can try there."

They left the car and walked down the main street. They found a selection of postcards on sale in the post office and bought several.

They returned to the car and set off for Nottingham.

Having found a parking spot they only had a short wait for the tram that took them into the centre of Nottingham.

They alighted in the Old Square and stood for a few moments to get their bearings.

"I think it's this way to the Victoria centre and this way to what they call Broadmarsh." Bruce pointed out the directions. "What would you like to do first?"

"I'm easy, how about you?"

"Tell you what, let's go visit the castle and we can then work out way back and look at the other places of interest and shops and stuff on the way back."

"Sounds ok to me." Dick agreed as they set off in the direction of the castle.

Despite the early hour Nottingham was extremely busy, even so it didn't take them long to find the castle, it being about a ten minute walk straight down Friar Gate from the city centre.

Arriving at the gatehouse they stood and surveyed the sight before them.

"Not very 'castle' looking is it." Dick remarked. "Although I bet I'm going to get the potted history now." He chuckled.

"Only if you want it." Bruce said giving Dick an 'I'm going to tell you anyway' look.

They started to walk up towards the castle.

"Well, it would seem that William the Conqueror built the first wooden structure on this site in 1067. It was then rebuilt in stone by Henry II in 1170. The castle was demolished in 1651 and a house was built. It was burnt out in 1831 then refurbished in 1875 after being left derelict for 45 years. Then in 1878 it became the first municipal museum and art gallery outside London.

I'll let you read the guide books if you want to know anymore." Bruce laughed playfully thumping Dick on the shoulder.

"Oh and you may be interested to know that there are many tunnels and caves that have been dug under the castle and city. In fact many people lived and worked in the caves at one time."

"Oh so we should feel at home then." Dick thumped Bruce back.

They spent a pleasant couple of hours walking round the Castle and its exhibitions. They then headed for the café and refreshed themselves with a well needed coffee.

From the castle they headed for the lace museum, and then they made their way down to the Trip to Jerusalem.

"This is claimed to be the oldest public house in Britain." Bruce told Dick as they approached the building. "Crusaders where supposed to have rested here on their way to the Holy Land."

Dick snapped some photographs of the exterior.

"It was built in 1189." Bruce added. "About five years before Richard the Lionheart reclaimed the castle from his brother John." Bruce glanced at is watch. "Are you bothered about going in or shall we go back and see what Nottingham has to offer in terms of retail therapy?"

"No, I'm not bothered. Time is marching on. Although I am thinking I would like to come here again sometime and spend more time looking around."

"Me too. It's a pity we are limited this trip." Bruce agreed.

They made their way back to the Old market square, browsing the shops as they went. By the time they boarded the tram for their return to the car they both had several carrier bags filled with purchases for themselves and gifts.

They stowed them in the trunk, or boot as Dick reminded Bruce it was called here in the U.K.

"Ok, I reckon by the time we get back we will just have time to have an early dinner and then get showered and changed for tonight."

"Where are we going?" Dick asked hoping Bruce would let it slip as to what they were going to do.

"The Ice rink." Bruce informed him smiling.

Dick pulled a puzzled face but said nothing.

After yet another excellent meal they sat and enjoyed a coffee in the lounge.

"You had better go get changed." Bruce pointed out tapping his watch. "We have about an hour before we need to leave."

"Er what should I dress like?" Dick asked again hoping Bruce would give an indication as to their destination.

"Oh smart casual will do."

"Oh Ok." Dick rose and headed off to his room still puzzled.

Dick met up with Bruce again in the foyer about forty five minutes later.

"You all ready?" Bruce asked him

"Yup."

"Ok well William is taking us tonight and then picking us up afterwards. It's easier than trying to park."

"Oh right."

"That's him now. Come on." Bruce urged Dick forward.

They both climbed into the back of the Rolls and William smoothly pulled away and they headed back towards Nottingham.

They pulled up in front of the Arena and Bruce and Dick got out of the car. Bruce leant in through the driver's side window and spoke with William.

Dick let his gaze drift to the exterior of the building scanning the various posters advertising forthcoming events.

"You ready?" Bruce asked taking Dicks elbow briefly, steering him towards the entrance.

As they approached Dick suddenly was enlightened as to the nature of their visit. He looked at Bruce who was grinning back at him.

"I hope this meets with your approval?" Bruce asked him. "I wasn't sure if you liked these or not. The few tracks that I have heard seem pretty good though. Anyway it was these or Justine Timberlake, and I sort of thought he would be more of a girls choice."

"Well maybe, but yes this is great thanks."

"That's ok. Come on lets find our seats."

They threaded their way through the crowds, looking for the direction signs as they went. The main body of the arena was filling rapidly. They stopped briefly to purchase a programme and then continued on.

Their seats where up front near the stage. Bruce checked the tickets for the number.

"I was considering booking a private box, but then I thought that it would be better to get seats here."

"Yeah, appreciate it. The atmosphere is usually better. We always get tickets for the stalls or standing when me and the guys go to concerts back home. There's a good view from here."

"Glad you approve."

"You know I never figured you would go for something like this."

"You know just because I go to those classical concerts and the opera doesn't mean I only like that stuff. Sometimes it bores me silly but I'm obliged to go to a lot of it. I like a lot of different stuff."

"Well I guess so. Just didn't have you pegged as a fan of these."

"Ah well, shows you don't know me as well as you thought." Bruce laughed.

The announcer introduced the support act and the crowd were suitable appreciative. At last the main act took to the stage to thunderous applause.

"…_. We are proud to introduce….. SNOW PATROL!..."_

Dick and Bruce stood by the curb watching for William. They didn't have long to wait before he pulled up.

"Did you have a good evening?" he enquired as he drew away.

"It was brilliant." Dick told him enthusiastically. "Wasn't it Bruce?"

"Yes indeed, I thoroughly enjoyed it. It was a nice change."

Dick chortled

"I caught you singing along."

"What me? Never."

"Oh yes you were. I know you said you liked them but I didn't realise you knew their stuff that well."

"Well I do just happen to have their album in the car at present, yes I know, I got a second copy seeing as how you had commandeered the first one."

Dick laughed, then yawned.

"Oh dear all this activity is catching up with me I think."

"I don't know, you youngsters." Bruce laughed then yawned himself. "That's all your fault!"

"What!"

"Well you started the yawning, its contagious you know."

William pulled the car up outside the hotel and Bruce and Dick alighted.

"Thank you William. We'll see you the day after tomorrow. Good night."

"Yes goodnight William" Dick called back.

Bruce caught up with him at the door.

"You fancy a nightcap?"

"No, I'm not bothered. I reckon I'll hit the sack."

"Ok. Good night then. I think I'll have one."

"Good night."

"Morning" Bruce peered over the top of his newspaper as Dick slid into the seat opposite him.

"Morning."

"Did you sleep well?"

"Yes like a log and you?"

"Yup. So what would you like to do today, once you have had breakfast."

"I'm not sure. What do you suggest?"

"Do you fancy going to Chatsworth House?" Bruce suggested. "I know its another stately home but this area is rich in history."

"Sounds ok to me."

"Tell you what you can drive today."

"Whoopee!" Dick said with humorous sarcasm.

Bruce raised his eyebrows but didn't reply, taking a sip of his coffee. Dick turned his attention to his breakfast.

After eating and whilst enjoying a last coffee they studied the map and traced the route.

"Mansfield, Chesterfield." Dick mumbled to himself as he traced the route with his finger. "It looks fairly straightforward. I'm sure you will navigate though." He looked up at Bruce.

"Of course, but like you say it's a straightforward route. I believe it's very rural in parts. You know twisting roads and such like."

"Ok."

"You ready then?" Bruce asked getting up from his seat. "Have you everything you need?"

"No I left my wallet and stuff in the room; I'll just nip up for it. You need anything fetching whilst I'm at it?"

Bruce patted his pockets.

"No I think I've everything, thanks. I'll go wait by the car."

Dick bounded out of the door and over to the car. Bruce held up the keys and tossed them to Dick who caught them deftly, climbing into the driver's seat.

He sat a few minutes familiarising himself with the controls, then started the car, pulling away smoothly.

The day was pleasantly warm and they had the windows down and the radio on.

"This makes a nice change, you driving" Bruce chuckled.

"Only because you either automatically get in the driving seat or Alfred's chauffeuring us. When I do get to drive it's when I'm going somewhere on my own or with the gang or we are going into work at different times, and when it comes to driving the Batmobile, well."

"What are you trying to say?"

"Nothing, just making a point."

"You're not complaining then?"

"No, no. I still think though that there are times you still don't either trust me or give me enough credit."

"Sorry. I guess its habit. I think I sometimes forget you're not a child anymore. Sorry. I know you can handle a car as well as anyone, and the bikes too. I guess it's me being over cautious."

"That's ok, I realise that, but it can be annoying at times." Dick grinned.

"Point taken."

"I hope so." Dick chuckled as he turned his attention back to the road.

Bruce settled back. Despite what he had said he was comfortable with Dicks driving abilities, although he was aware that Dick often drove a little too fast at times, especially when on one of the bikes, he knew that he was more than capable. Bruce often accused Dick of being reckless but in truth he knew he wouldn't attempt something if he didn't believe he could do it.

The countryside flashed by punctuated by isolated farms and small hamlets. They skirted the town of Mansfield and found the main road that led to Chesterfield. At points on this road the views were spectacular.

As they approached the roundabout that was where they turned off Bruce pointed out the spire on the church across to their right.

"Look." He pointed. "See how it's twisted out of shape, crooked."

As they were in queuing traffic Dick was able to glance across.

"Is was meant to have been twisted by the devil sitting on it, but more than likely it was because they used green wood." Bruce told him as they started to move again.

The road they were on began to climb steadily; large houses gave way to the odd farmhouse in the midst of fields studded with sheep, the occasional cows and the odd horse. As the road levelled off a large public house appeared off to the left. The Highwayman, the sign proclaimed.

"I can see why that was called that." Bruce commented as the left it behind and the road began to drop away. "As I understand the map, we have just climbed up one side of the Pennines and we are now descending the other side."

The road twisted and turned high cliffs on one side and long drops on the other. Then high cliffs on both sides, rivulets sprang from the ground and danced and trickled down the rocks. It took all Dick's concentration to navigate the tight turns. Eventually the road levelled out and became more even.

Ahead of them was a roundabout.

"Which way?" Dick asked as they approached it.

"It's the first exit left." Bruce instructed. "Although you can only go left on a roundabout." He added laughing.

Dick followed the road round.

"We need to head for Baslow." Bruce told him as he watched for the road signs.

"Its more straightforward than I imagined." Dick commented as they followed the signs directions.

They approached Baslow, but turned off to the left just before the church. It wasn't long before the signs were directing them to Chatsworth. Dick turned the car into the driveway and along the long narrow approach to the big house. As they mounted a small rise the House appeared in the distance slightly to their right. Dick slowed the car right down. Sheep were wandering freely and the odd one would wander onto the road.

In font of the House there was a river, the road crossed this on a very narrow bridge. The car park was straight ahead at the left of the building.

They were directed to a parking spot by a florescent green coated warden. It was surprisingly busy. Dick reversed into the space indicated and turned off the engine.

"Well we made it." Bruce laughed.

"Yup. Did you put….?"

"Yes I did, it's on the back seat." Bruce said reaching back to retrieve the rucksack He pulled out a couple of bottles of mineral water from it, handing one to Dick. "I knew you would be ready for a drink."

Dick drank thirstily.

"I was definitely ready for that."

They alighted from the car and locked it up, then headed in the direction of the main entrance to the house.

"What do you say? A tour of the House then a wander round the gardens. Then we can see about having something to eat." Bruce suggested.

"Sounds good to me." Dick concurred.

The House was an amazing collection of rooms filled with antiques, art and magnificent décor. They wandered around consulting the guide book they had bought for the information on each particular location.

Dick was astounded by the cleverly painted violin painted on the door off one of the bedrooms.

"It looks as if you could just pick it from the hook and play it!"

At the end of the tour they browsed the small gift shop, picking up the now obligatory postcards.

They then strolled around the gardens, taking in the various water features. They were just in time to see the cascade at work. On one of the paths the 'fake' tree surprised them as water suddenly cascaded from its branches. They explored the maze, managing to get through it without any trouble.

They eventually found a suitable spot to sit for a while and enjoy the sunshine.

"You know its must be an awesome feat to manage all this. I mean I thought Wayne Manor had a lot of land but wow!" Dick said as he lay back with his hands behind his head.

"I agree. I suppose like me they have people who do that for them though. I couldn't run Wayne Enterprises single handed."

"You'd have a damn good go though." Dick laughed.

Bruce looked askance at Dick, who squinted back at him, the sun being in his eyes.

Bruce sighed settled down on the grass on his stomach. Dick turned his head to look at him.

"You alright?"

"Sure why?"

"That was a big sigh." Dick pointed out.

"Oh just relaxing that's all."

They both lay there for a while. Dick turned his head to look at Bruce again. He smiled to himself. Bruce was snoring gently, his head on his arms. Dick sat up and fished the water bottle from the rucksack and drank. It was a nice change to see that Bruce was actually relaxing.

Dick sat quietly, his arms resting on bent knees, watching the other tourists, some who where sat on the same stretch of grass just resting or having a picnic. Children ran about playing soccer, or trying to get a kite aloft. The sun was pleasantly warm, and the air fragrant with flowers and greenery.

Dick resolved to let Bruce sleep on for a while.

Checking his watch, Dick decided that it was time he should wake Bruce. He gently shook his shoulder. Bruce woke with a deep intake of breath. He rolled over slowly and sat up, rubbing his eyes with his index fingers. He tried to focus on his watch.

"Boy I must have needed that."

"Well I let you sleep; I figured you must have needed it. Its not often you crash like that." Dick absentmindedly picked off a few blades of dry grass that had adhered to Bruce's shirt.

Bruce brushed off the rest.

"Come on then." Bruce stood up and stretched. "Lets go and find somewhere to eat I'm famished." He held out a hand to Dick, who took it, and pulled him to his feet. Dick brushed the grass from his jeans.

They headed back to the car. The place they where heading for was reached by another entrance. It only took a short while to exit the main gate and head further up the road to the Farm shop and restaurant area.

They decided that the Farm Shop restaurant was the most promising place to eat.

Perusing the menu they decided on, Steak Pie with new potatoes and seasonal vegetables for Dick and Roast of the day, it being beef, with Yorkshire pudding and vegetables for Bruce.

Dick opted for a simple lemon meringue for dessert and Bruce had a lemon and lime cheesecake. They sat and savoured a cup of coffee to round it all off.

"I think I could just go back to sleep now." Bruce yawned and stretched.

"Well I suppose you could get your head down in the car on the way back." Dick suggested.

"You don't need me to navigate then?" Bruce grinned.

"Er, no thank you. I think I can find my way back alright."

Bruce again checked his watch.

"Come on then let's head back. We have to be ready quite early tomorrow for when William picks us up. We can get most of our stuff packed tonight."

"Ok. I reckon I could do with an earlier night anyway. What time is he coming?"

"Around half past eight. He's picking us up first then we are meeting Alfred."

"I hope he has had a good time."

"I called him last night he seems to be. But he did say he was looking forward to seeing us again."

"Awww"

Bruce and Dick headed for the hotel lounge. They had decided to have a cup of tea before they retired to their respective rooms for the evening.

Bruce ordered a round of sandwiches to accompany the tea. As he pointed out that as it would be a long wait till breakfast, but having had such a large cooked dinner, they wouldn't want another hot meal.

"Mind you, I'm sure you would be able to manage it." He laughed. "It never ceases to amaze me how much food you can put away sometimes."

Dick was unable to answer his mouth being full of ham sandwich.

William was waiting outside for them. Dick helped load the luggage whilst Bruce dealt with the bill.

"Have you had a good couple of days?" William enquired.

"You know William it's been great to just unwind. I know Bruce has for once."

Bruce appeared

"What have I done?" he asked hearing the tail end of the conversation.

"I was just saying you have managed to relax for once." Dick repeated.

"I most certainly have. I'm also looking forward to a few more days of it too. In fact I can't believe I haven't had a frantic call yet saying something or other has gone wrong or needs my urgent attention."

"Could be that Alfred threatened them that there would be trouble if they did." Dick smiled. "Heaven forbid they cross Alfred. He can be worse than Margaret at times."

"What are you saying? He only tries to protect me you know."

"I know and my friends often say it's difficult to get through to me sometimes if Alfred thinks I shouldn't be disturbed either."

"I know but he is only looking after us both." Bruce pointed out. "That's his job. Anyway is everything stowed away?"

Dick nodded.

"Ok lets get off or Alfred will be wondering where we have got to."

They climbed on board as William shut the boot. He got behind the wheel and started the engine.

"What about the hire car?" Dick asked as they pulled away.

"Oh they will send someone to collect it later. I left the keys with the receptionist." Bruce assured him. "It's all arranged."

"Oh right, ok."

They both settled back for the relatively short ride back to Nottingham to collect Alfred. Bruce opened the newspaper he had bought and began to glance through it, before offering it to Dick, who accepted it and he too flipped through it fairly rapidly, before opening it at the page with the crossword.

"Let's see if we can do it before we pick Alfred up." He chuckled. "I upset him when we were on the train to Oxford by getting the last clue he was stuck on. Well not so much upset him as surprised him"

"Hmm, ok go on call the clues out."

"I don't suppose you have a pen do you?"

Bruce sighed and retrieved his briefcase, clicking it open he produced a pen which he handed to Dick.

"Ok, one across. 'defence plea'? Well that's easy. Alibi. Seven across 'very small particle', eight letters."

"Molecule." Bruce chipped in. Dick filled in the grid.

"Flying toys. That would be kites." Bruce nodded his agreement.

"Improbable in nature, ten across." Dick looked at Bruce thoughtfully.

"Have you got any letters in?" Bruce asked.

"No hang on two down, is red meat which would be beef so the first letter of ten across will be 'f'. Oh and its three and seven letters."

Bruce considered the clue.

"Far fetched! Does that fit?"

Dick put the letters in. "Yup."

Between them they placed all the answers in the grid quite quickly.

"Hmm not too difficult really. Although I think if it had been the Times crossword we wouldn't have been as quick." Bruce laughed.

"For sure." Dick laughed. He was already filling in the crossword puzzle with both cryptic and quick clues. "You know I haven't had a go at this Su-Doku puzzle thing, although the girls do them all the time."

"Huh, Oh I've done them they are quite easy. In fact I don't bother with them anymore. Not bad for keeping your mind agile."

Dick didn't answer as he was rapidly filling in the blanks.

"Bingo! You were right it wasn't too difficult." Dick proclaimed as he entered the last digit.

"Well at least we did manage to do them before we got here." Bruce waved his hand indicating that they had reached their first destination.

William alighted from the car and went to knock on the door. Bruce and Dick got out too. Alfred appeared and William took his suitcase from just inside the front door and carried it to the car where he placed it in the boot with the other luggage.

Bruce clasped Alfred's hand and shook it.

"Have you had a good time?" he asked.

Alfred's friend had followed him down the path.

"We have. It's been a really nice change and we have reminisced endlessly." He enthused.

"Yes it's been wonderful. I have enjoyed being able to relax too. Have you two had a good time?"

"Yes, but we have missed you." Dick told him as Bruce shook hands with Alfred's friend.

"I'm sure you have." Alfred chuckled.

Bruce and Dick climbed back into the car as Alfred took his leave of his friend before joining them.

As William drove away they all waved to Alfred's friend who stood at the kerb till the car disappeared around the bend.

William steered the car through the traffic and headed towards the motorway and North towards Scotland.

Alfred and Bruce chatted quietly; Dick watched the passing traffic and scenery through the window occasionally contributing to the discussion.

The motorway route was a little monotonous, but the Rolls easily ate up the miles.

The traffic built up and progress slowed as they approached Sheffield.

A bus loaded with teenagers, no doubt headed on a school trip to somewhere pulled alongside. A gaggle of giggling young girls was crowded at the window waving and gesturing at the passing traffic.

Dick's gaze lifted upwards, attracted by the movement. Turning away he grinned at the spectacle. Noticing him the girls began to wave frantically at him to draw his attention back. He laughed as they waved and blew kisses at him. He waved back cautiously, unsure if he should.

One girl began to make signs at him, breathing on the window and drawing a heart, she clutched her heart, suggesting '_I love you'_.

Dick shook his head, smiling.

"What's happening?" Bruce asked.

"Admirers." Dick pointed grinning.

"Oh, let's see then." Bruce leaned across Dick to see.

Seeing Bruce the girls went into paroxysms, blowing more kisses and waving harder. As Bruce waved back they became helpless with laughter, feigning adoration.

Bruce hutched up closer to Dick and they both waved at the girls playfully tormenting them. The bus pulled away from them and the girls looked disappointed. For a short time the bus and the Roll's drew alongside each other then pulled away. Eventually the Roll's pulled away and sped off.

Bruce and Dick collapsed back laughing.

"Now then you boys behave yourselves." Alfred admonished trying to keep a straight face but failing.

Dick sat with his eyes closed, earphones in his ears. Bruce touched his arm.

"You asleep?"

Dick opened one eye and then reached up to pull one earpiece out.

"Nope why?"

"Oh I was just wondering. Alfred's snoring and you looked as if you had nodded off."

Dick leaned forward to observe Alfred and grinned.

"Feeling lonely where you?"

"Not at all, anyway William has just told me we will be turning off soon so we can have lunch."

"Oh, ok." Dick glanced at his watch. "We have made good time so far." He commented.

"Yes we have been lucky the traffic hasn't been too bad since that initial hold up."

"Hmm, where are we going to have lunch then?"

"Hallgarth Manor hotel. It's near Durham. Someone recommended it to me, so Alfred booked a table for us."

The meal was excellent, as good as had been recommended.

Bruce opted to start with a Waldorf salad, Dick melon and Alfred and William had the soup. For the main course Bruce went with the Gressingham Duck, Dick had the venison and Alfred and William played safe with fillet steak.

For dessert Bruce had a chocolate and pear torte, Dick couldn't resist the Chocolate chip cheesecake with strawberries. Alfred had warm apricot and Bakewell tart. William declined a sweet protesting he was full and would fall asleep at the wheel if he ate another mouthful.

They lingered over the coffee, allowing time for their meal to digest, before returning to the car and their journey north.

William drew up in front of an impressive stone cottage, 'Garden Cottage', the sign proclaimed.

They unpacked the 'boot' and carried the luggage inside. Dick volunteered to carry the cases up the curving staircase to the bedrooms.

"Now you are sure you are happy with the guest house?" Bruce asked William.

"I'm fine Mr Wayne. I stay there quite often so they look after me."

"Well if you are sure. See you in a few days then. I've got another car hired for our stay here."

"Very good sir. It will be nice to have another couple of days to myself, paid holiday eh?"

"As long as you are happy with the arrangement." Bruce pressed for reassurance.

"Oh yes I really cant grumble. I hope you have a good stay too."

"I'm sure we will, you can not believe how long it has been since I, well, we were able to relax as much as this."

"Alfred mentioned that to me. You certainly were ready for a holiday. Ok I'll be off then and I will see you in a couple of days."

Bruce watched the car drive away before going into the house. He found Alfred and Dick in the kitchen.

"Are you sure you can drive one of those things?" Dick was laughing.

"Young man I have cooked a three course meal on an open fire before, so I'm sure I can manage an aga." He said looking very serious.

"Is there a problem?" Bruce asked concerned.

"Oh no." Alfred assured him. "Young Dick was just teasing me about the cooker being an aga. What he fails to realise is that the kitchen back home once had one."

"Alfred's right, I can just about remember it."

"Ok, ok I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Dick held his hands up in defeat.

"In fact I'll demonstrate by getting the kettle on." Alfred told him.

"Now that's a good idea." Dick and Bruce chorused together.

They sat in the lounge, relaxing, drinking tea and eating biscuits, the kitchen having been stocked with supplies prior to their arrival.

"So what's the plan for our stay here?" Dick asked looking round at Alfred and Bruce from his reclined position on the floor in front of the open fireplace. Alfred had lit a fire as it had turned a little chilly.

"I'm going to visit a friend of mine who works at Balmoral castle tomorrow. You and Bruce can explore on your own." Alfred told him, dunking his biscuit in his tea.

"Did you pack your hiking gear?" Bruce asked.

"Yes." Dick nodded to reaffirm the answer.

"I thought you and I could have a good long walk. You know admire the scenery and all that."

"Sounds good to me. It will help walk off all the food we have been putting away." Dick agreed, patting his stomach.

"That's what I thought too. There's nothing like good long hike in the fresh air. Problem is that it might stimulate our appetites as well."

"Well I'm sure you can fill up on haggis and 'neeps'" Alfred interjected.

"What!" Dick sat up. "Haggis and what?"

"Turnip." Alfred elucidated.

"I don't think I like the sound of haggis." Dick pulled a face that showed disgust.

"Don't knock it until you've tried it." Bruce told him wagging a finger.

"Have you ever had it?" Dick countered.

"Yes several times. I have attended several Burns night celebrations. It's not at all bad."

"True." Alfred agreed. "Along with a nice drop of scotch whiskey to wash it down."

"Ok, ok I give in and bow to superior experience. Ouch!" he exclaimed as Bruce threw a cushion at him hitting him square in the face.

He placed the cushion in position on the floor and leaned on it.

"Alfred have we got a map of the area?" Bruce asked.

"I think I saw one in one of the drawers, I'll get it."

"No its ok I'll go." Bruce rose and headed for the kitchen.

Dick rolled over and lay on his back, his hands behind his head; he put his stocking feet up on the seat of the nearest armchair.

"So Alfred, what are you doing tomorrow?" he asked turning his head in Alfred's direction.

"My friend is coming to pick me up and we are going to his cottage then out for lunch." Alfred told him.

"I'm assuming he's an ex military colleague." Dick probed.

"Well let's say we worked together at 'the palace' and leave it at that." Alfred told him evasively.

"Point taken." Dick tapped the side of his nose.

Bruce wandered in back from the kitchen an ordinance survey map open in his hands. He knelt on the floor and spread it out between Dick and himself. Dick rolled onto his side to look at the map.

"This is where we are." Bruce indicated stabbing the map with his finger. "There are several trails we could go on. How energetic are you feeling?" he laughed.

"Right now not very, but after a good nights sleep, well who knows."

"Hmm. Ok well I tell you what, look here." He traced a line with his finger. "This route has several options from a short stroll to a major hike. It's a roundabout route so we can decide once we are walking."

"Sounds alright to me." Dick leaned over to study the route Bruce had traced out. "The longest route has quite a climb here he pointed out. "Mind you it would be alright, we should manage it in a day even taking our time."

"Ok, so that's our planned route then? We can get an early start."

"My friend isn't picking me up till about ten, so I'll pack you up some lunch to take with you."

"Thank you Alfred. I'm sure Dick and I could manage between us though."

"It's no problem."

Dick rolled over again and rose onto his knees. He stretched his arms over his head, yawning.

"Well I'm off to bed. This country air is getting to me. What time do you want to be setting out in the morning?"

"About eight?" Bruce suggested raising his eyebrows.

"Sounds good." Dick said through another yawn as he stood up. "Ok I'm off, good night."

"Good night." Bruce and Alfred said in unison as Dick left the room.

Bruce and Dick quickly settled into their stride, their steps matching each others. They spoke little, enjoying each others company.

They paused only to enjoy a particular beautiful vista or to divest themselves firstly of the coats they had donned against the early morning misty chill, and then of their sweaters as the sun burnt off the haze, which they stowed in their rucksacks. Now and then they stopped to watch the wildlife they encountered, standing quietly so as not to disturb.

They where in no hurry, they had all day in which to complete the route, and they both were reluctant to let the peace and tranquillity of this place pass them by.

It was pleasant not to be recognised and not have to dodge the paparazzi that dogged then both back home. Bruce couldn't go anywhere or do anything without it being reported and speculated upon in the press the following day. Woe betide he be seen with a woman. The media had him married off and having children before you could say 'hold the front page'.

Then again, although at times tiresome, it served a purpose to distract them in this way.

Dick was beginning to receive the same amount of attention, although Bruce had managed to shield him from it for a long while, once Dick began going out and about and attending more functions with Bruce their attention had begun to swing between them.

They reached what was the halfway point of their trek. It was getting very warm as the sun climbed high towards its zenith.

"I think this is as good a place as any to take a break." Bruce suggested indicating an area off the track.

"Sounds good to me." Dick agreed.

They sat down on the grass and stretched their legs out, easing the slight cramp in their calves.

"It's warmer than I expected it to be." Dick commented as he delved into his rucksack for a bottle of water, unscrewing the lid he drank deeply.

"It's more than warm." Bruce said as he followed suit. "I reckon we'll rest here a while and have our lunch."

"Hmm. Yes why not." Dick dug out a sandwich box from his bag. Bruce followed suit.

After eating Dick lay back with his head on the rucksack and closed his eyes. Wafting an insect away with his hand Bruce looked down at him.

"You're not going to sleep, are you?" Dick was wearing sunglasses so Bruce couldn't see his eyes.

"Nah, just relaxing."

"Just checking." Bruce chuckled. He leant forward resting his folded arms on his bent knees with his chin on his hands and surveyed the view.

It was quiet, well as quiet as the countryside could be, with the trill of different types of birds and the buzz of insects. Now and again a bush would rustle indicating the presence of some unseen creature.

As he sat he began to see more closely the abundance of life around him, and to pick out the different calls of the birds.

He noticed the grouse hiding in the long grass. Then the red squirrels darting in and out of the trees leafy canopies.

A movement caught his eye and he at transfixed as a large Red Deer ambled into view. It sniffed the air suspiciously but seeing nothing moving continued to stand motionless for a while. Bruce wanted to nudge Dick so that he could also see the magnificent creature but hardly dare breathe let alone move to alert Dick. It was so close he felt he could reach out and stroke it. The Stag picked up its ears at some distant sound and moved back into the cover.

Bruce sighed sadly.

"You alright?" Dick asked softly, obviously having heard the sigh.

"Yes I just saw a Deer just there, so close."

"I saw it. It was amazing." Dick told him. "I wonder what made it move off like that."

"I think the reason is approaching up the trail as we speak." Bruce nodded with his head in the direction the now audible sounds where coming from. "Looks like we have company."

Dick sat up and ran his fingers through his thick hair, scratching the back of his head. He pushed the sunglasses back up on the bridge of his nose with his middle finger.

He found a bottle of water and opening it, took a long drink.

The sound of voices got louder and it became obvious that they originated from a female source. This was apparent when a group of four young women came into view below them.

The women had noticed Bruce and Dick and as they drew near paused to speak with them.

"Hello." They chorused together.

"Its nice now isn't it? Although it's maybe a bit too warm for walking." One of them commented.

"Yes, although it was quite cool when we set out this morning." Bruce said amiably. "We were just having a break."

"Mind if we join you?" One of the other women asked. "We could do with a sit down."

Bruce shrugged.

"Be our guests."

The four busied themselves settling down and distributing drinks amongst themselves.

"Have you been here long, I mean in Scotland?" One of the girls asked.

"We arrived yesterday, but we are only staying a couple of days." Bruce informed them.

"We're here for two weeks, this is our second week. Oh I'm Beth by the way." The young woman introduced herself.

"Carol."

"Ann."

"Stacey."

The others introduced themselves in turn.

"I'm Bruce and this is," Bruce indicated in Dick's direction.

"I'm Dick." He nodded his head in greeting lifting his sunglasses onto his head.

"Nice to meet you." Beth replied. "I take it you're American judging by the accents."

"Guilty." Bruce laughed, "I also deduce that you are Irish. Southern Ireland?"

Beth laughed.

"Well sort of, my parents are but I live in Sheffield now, we are all at Uni' together." She waved her hand in the direction of the others.

"What are you studying?" Bruce asked with some interest.

"I'm studying English Lit, as is Carol, Stacey and Ann are doing performing arts." Beth explained. "What do you do?"

"Oh I manage a large company; Dick here is training to be an assistant manager." Bruce told them being a little evasive about the true nature of his position.

"Oh nice, what's your relationship then? Just friends or what." Ann asked.

"Bruce is my father, well foster father anyway." Dick volunteered.

"Really Awww, that's nice." Beth said putting her hands over her heart.

Dick shook his head slightly not sure if she was sincere or not.

"I have to say it's about time we found some talent. The only men we have encountered so far have been old or proper anoraks!" Stacey exclaimed laughing.

"Stacey!" The other girls admonished her together.

Bruce and Dick looked at each other with a "should we be afraid" expression.

"Please excuse Stacey she's a proper nympho at times." Beth apologised.

"I am not." Stacey protested indignantly. I'm only stating the truth."

"She has got a point." Carol pointed out.

"Well true." Beth conceded.

Bruce and Dick remained silent, eyes wide, not sure quite how to react, looking from one girl to the other as they spoke.

"Sorry, you two, don't mean to frighten you off." Ann said noticing their expressions.

"Er, no it's ok, it's just, well, we're both flattered I'm sure." Bruce managed to get out. "That's right isn't it Dick?"

"Er, yes, I guess so." Dick recovered his composure. "So where are you ladies staying?" He asked for the want of something to say.

"We have a cottage in the village. You?" Beth asked.

"We have one a little way out of the village." Dick told her.

"Hey what are you both doing tonight?" Carol asked as if she had just had an idea.

"We haven't planned anything as yet why?"

"Well, why don't we all meet up in the pub tonight for a drink, hey its even Karaoke night, social highlight of the month."

"Whoooohoooo." The girls chirped together

Dick looked at Bruce.

"Well I suppose we could. We won't promise anything though." Bruce offered.

"Ok that's fair enough." Carol agreed.

Bruce glanced at his watch.

"We really must be heading off back now, we have stayed here longer than we planned."

Dick began to pack things away in his rucksack, Bruce followed suit.

Standing up they hefted the packs onto their backs.

"It's been nice meeting you." Bruce told the women politely.

"Likewise, you too. Hope you do make it to the pub tonight."

Bruce nodded as he and Dick made to take their leave and exchanged good byes.

As they moved out of sight and earshot Dick looked at Bruce and they both laughed.

"Well, do you fancy going to meet them tonight?" Dick asked. "It might be a laugh."

"As long as you don't expect me to get up and sing. I don't see why not, maybe Alfred would come too. Chaperone us." Bruce chuckled.

"Well yes, I guess he would need to chaperone you, I've read about you and the ladies in the papers."

"What! All lies, all lies. Vicious rumours put about by the press. You should talk."

"Me? Oh, I'm sweet and innocent still." Dick tried to look angelic.

Bruce spluttered with mirth.

"Bruce I'm hurt." Dick clasped his hands to his chest with a pained expression.

Bruce just looked at Dick with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, again shaking his head.

"Go where to do what!" Alfred asked looking at both of them with astonishment.

"To the local pub for the karaoke night." Bruce told him.

"And the other part?"

"We said we would meet up with four girls we met today. Well we said we might."

Alfred looked amazed.

"And you want me to come too?"

"Oh Alfred why not?" Dick asked him in pleading tones. "I'm told it's the 'social highlight of the month'."

"I'm sure I would only cramp your style." Alfred pointed out.

"Aw come off it. We are just being sociable that's all." Bruce protested.

"Go on Alfred come with us." Dick begged.

Alfred looked as if he was considering the situation carefully.

"All right, but I'm not singing. I hate those infernal machines."

"Way to go Alfred." Dick patted him on the back. "I'm going to have a shower and change." He disappeared upstairs.

"Trust him to get the bathroom first." Bruce complained amiably. He headed for the bottom of the stairs.

"Don't use all the hot water, or else." He shouted up.

From the outside the Prince of Wales pub looked inviting, especially after the walk from the cottage.

The scents and sounds assaulted them as they entered through the front doors.

The three of them paused momentarily, surveying the interior. The four girls didn't appear to be there.

"It looks as if we may have been stood up." Bruce remarked smiling.

"Maybe we've just got here before them." Dick pointed out.

As if in response to his remark Beth came into the bar from the rear of the building.

"Hey, great, glad you could make it. We're out the back in the 'beer garden'. I just popped in to see if you had arrived. Hello, are you with these two?" She asked holding out her hand to Alfred.

"Alfred this is…." Bruce hesitated over her name. "Beth." He ventured.

"Correct, well remembered." Beth chuckled shaking Alfred's hand. "Pleased to meet you Alfred."

"Pleased to meet you too my dear." Alfred greeted.

"We'll come out and join you when we get our drinks, can we get you all another?" Bruce asked.

"Thank you, I'll just pop and see what the girls want, hang on a mo." Beth disappeared out of the rear doors.

The barmaid had provided a tray and Dick carried it out to where the girls where sitting around a large circular table under a garish umbrella. Bruce pulled three more chairs up to the table and they too sat down.

Beth introduced Alfred to the other girls.

"Do you work for the same company then?" Carol asked him.

Alfred shot a look at Bruce.

"Well I suppose you could say that." He proffered.

"So you are all workmates then?" Carol continued. "Oh no of course you said he was your dad." She recollected pointing at Bruce then Dick.

"We do all reside in the same house." Alfred told her.

"Oh! Oh no you're not gay are you? I mean that would be just typical, find a decent man and they are taken or gay."

"My dear I can assure you that is not the case." Alfred told her.

"Phewww, just house mates then, thank goodness."

Alfred looked at Bruce who gave a brief shake of his head, indicating that Alfred should proffer no details of their true identity at this juncture.

They were all so engrossed in conversation that they didn't even notice the karaoke when it began, and where startled when the barmaid told them it was last orders.

"Would you like a last drink?" Bruce asked.

Everyone declined.

"It's a bit of a walk back and I for one will not make it if I have another." Stacy laughed.

"Maybe we could escort you home. It's late and the roads not that well lit if at all." Bruce offered.

"Oh that would be nice. You could come in for a coffee if you like." Ann looked at the other girls for approval of her offer.

"Well, we'll see how we feel when we get there." Bruce conceded.

The walk was a pleasant one; the night was warm with an occasional light breeze that rustled the foliage. The sound of owls made an eerie accompaniment to the buzz of nocturnal insects.

As they walked carol fell in step with Bruce, Ann and Stacey flanked Alfred and Beth walked alongside Dick.

"I'm glad you offered to walk with us. It's so scary at night." Stacey told Alfred.

"Glad to be of service my dear."

"You know Alfred you talk just like some posh butler in a movie." Ann told him. "You know, so 'proper'."

"Must be my military training." Alfred told her with a twinkle in his eye.

"It's rather sweet though. Well you are, sweet that is." Ann told him.

Reaching the girls cottage, the three men decided to stay for at least one coffee.

"I'll get the kettle on." Carol said as she hurried into the kitchen.

Dick had sat on the bench outside the cottage under the window. Beth sank down beside him. As Alfred and Bruce went inside with Ann and Stacey they continued the conversation they had been having on the walk back.

Carol brought them their coffee and went straight back inside.

"I think those two 'want to be alone'." She said indicating with her head in the general direction of Dick and Beth.

Bruce and Alfred exchanged looks and the girls nodded knowingly.

Dick and Beth sat sipping their coffee appreciatively. They had fallen into an easy silence, just enjoying each others company.

Dick studied Beth's features. Lit by the light from the window, her hair was an auburn mass of natural corkscrew curls that cascaded halfway down her back and framed her oval face. She had soft green eyes veiled by long lashes. A smattering of freckles sat on a small pert nose. She had classic cupids bow lips which, slightly parted showed a row of white teeth, the canine on the left being slightly crooked.

Her voice had a soft lilting cadence and Dick found it rather soothing.

"Are you alright?" She asked bringing Dick out of his reverie.

"Yes sorry I was miles away."

"I hope not." Beth chortled softly as she returned his gaze.

Dick dropped his eyes a little embarrassed. Beth hooked her finger under his chin and lifted his head.

"Don't do that." She chided gently, smiling genially. "I know we have just met but I wouldn't have taken you for being shy." Beth studied his face for a reaction. True they had only just met but there was something about this guy that drew her to him. She couldn't quite put a finger on it. Granted he was very handsome, in fact she felt she would be right in describing him as beautiful. She was sure there should be some poem or prose she should know that would describe him, but it escaped her right now. She just couldn't help gazing into his startlingly vivid blue eyes.

"Damn!" She thought to herself. "Why him, here and why now?" The last thing she had reckoned on was this, falling for a complete stranger, a holiday romance.

She felt her pulse quicken.

"Have you finished your coffee?" Bruce's question broke into her thoughts.

"Yes, but if you don't mind I'll hang around, I'll follow you later. Well that's if Beth doesn't mind." Dick looked at her questioningly.

"No I don't mind." Beth answered a little too quickly. "I'm enjoying the chat." She added unnecessarily.

"Ok, you have a key?" Bruce asked Dick.

Dick felt in his pocket and pulled out a key, holding it up to confirm he had.

"Ok see you later."

Bruce and Alfred called their goodbyes to the girls and began the walk back to their cottage. Carol, Ann and Stacey went back inside, closing the door softly behind them. The door opened again and Carol popped her head out.

"We're all off to bed now. Night night." She waved her hand as she closed the door once more.

"Night." Beth and Dick chorused together.

"You fancy another coffee?" Beth asked

"No thanks." Dick turned towards her, leaning forward slightly. "Ok where were we?"

Bruce opened the door to Dick's bedroom slightly and was relieved to see the bed occupied. He hadn't heard Dick return, as he had fallen asleep the moment his head hit the pillow. He closed the door as quietly as he could and went down the stairs.

Alfred was already in the kitchen in the midst of preparing breakfast.

"I take it Dick is still asleep."

"Yes, did you hear him come in?"

"No I'm afraid I didn't."

"I reckon we should leave him in bed. Anyway we hadn't really planned anything for today, had you?" Bruce enquired.

"Well no not really, well not this morning anyway." Alfred placed a plate of food on the table. "There you are." He indicated that it was for Bruce.

"I am meeting my friend again later on. Speaking of which, there was something I wanted to ask you but I didn't get a chance yesterday."

Bruce looked up his fork halfway to his mouth.

"Go on."

"Well firstly my friend said he can arrange for you and Dick to go and have a look around the castle this afternoon, a private visit."

"That's good of him, but I suspect there's a catch!"

"Well not really. Well he mentioned that they have been having some things go missing and when he told me about them I told him that you had a small collection of similar items."

"Yes?" Bruce put his fork down and eyed Alfred curiously. Come on Alfred it's not like you to be so evasive."

"Well it seems that several Faberge Eggs and a couple of rare Faberge miniature chairs have disappeared. Its not been made public knowledge for several reasons. I told him you would be interested in viewing them. I thought that maybe you would be able to 'suggest' how they are being taken."

"Oh did you now." Bruce sounded quite stern, and then laughed. "Oh Alfred its typical isn't it? I can't even have a holiday without being drawn into a mysterious crime."

"I did tell my friend that you where a huge fan of Sherlock Holmes and loved amateur sleuthing."

"Oh you did, did you? And just what are the police doing about it?"

"Well it would seem they are at a loss to discover just what is happening."

"Mmmm." Bruce mumbled thoughtfully. "Ok. I suppose it won't hurt to have a look."

"I'll ring him and check that it's alright for this afternoon."

"Ok. Now I'm going to finish my breakfast and then I'm going to put my feet up and read the papers. I reckon Dick won't be getting up for a while yet, but it won't hurt to leave him. After all he is on holiday too."

"I agree." Alfred smiled.

Alfred pulled the car up in the parking space he had been directed to by his friend who, having been watching for their arrival came out to greet them.

Alfred introduced them.

"Harold, this is my boss Bruce Wayne and this is Dick Grayson." Bruce and Dick proffered their hands.

"I'm Harold Napier, but everyone calls me Harry." The tall grey haired gentleman told them as he shook each hand in turn. "It's a pleasure to meet you; Alfred has told me so much about you both. Come on in then and I'll show you round." He gestured towards the open door behind him.

Harry led them on a guided tour, regaling them with snippets of interesting facts. Eventually they came back to where they had started.

"I hope you will join me for a cuppa?" Harry asked.

"That would be very nice, thank you." Bruce accepted graciously.

Over tea, Harry brought up the subject of the missing treasures.

"Alfred told me that you have a couple of the miniature chairs in your own collection."

"I do, and three eggs." Bruce told him. "Alfred said it would be possible to view the ones here, is that correct?"

"Yes I've been able to arrange that for you. Alfred suggested that you have an interest in detection and that you may be able to throw some light on what has happened to the missing items."

"I'm sure Alfred credits me with more than I can possibly claim." Bruce smiled. "But surely the police are 'on the case' so to speak."

"Well you would have thought so." Harry shook his head. "They have drawn a blank so far. Whatever the motive it would be difficult to fence the goods or sell on the open market as they would be recognised, so all they can think of is it must be for a private collector. They have drawn a blank there too."

"Well I for one can assure you that I haven't seen any offered for sale other than the one that hit the headlines a couple of months ago." Bruce told him.

"If you have finished your drink I'll show you the collection." Harry stood up.

Harry ushered them into a large panelled room. Glass display cases lined one wall.

Bruce wandered down the row of cabinets admiring the treasures. Dick did likewise making small sounds of exclamation every now and then.

"So how much has gone missing?" Bruce asked Harry.

"So far, a couple of the chairs and four eggs."

"Hmm." Bruce stood and surveyed the room. "What security do you use other than the cameras?"

"Well there are guards patrolling and the windows and doors are alarmed."

"The cabinets aren't alarmed then?"

"Er no. I know its stupid but it was considered that there was enough security as it's not widely known the stuff is held here."

"I see." Bruce looked thoughtful. "So it has to be someone who has an interest in order to be aware of it. Has anyone asked to view them recently?"

"No, not view, although someone did ask about the Faberge collection a couple of months ago. He wasn't told about it being held here."

"Any idea as to who he was?" Dick asked.

"Let me think, Oh I remember he said his name was Nick Hesse. I remember thinking about Rudolf Hess, but he told me it was spelt H.E.S.S.E."

"Interesting." Bruce again became thoughtful. "What's next door?" He asked pointing.

"It's just another room. There's nothing much in there at the moment as its being redecorated and renovated." Harry told him. "Why?"

"Any chance I could have a look in there?" Bruce asked.

"I don't see why not." Harry sounded puzzled as he led the way back to the door.

"Dick, just stand over there by the wall will you." Bruce pointed.

As Bruce and Harry left the room Dick walked over to the wall, shrugging his shoulders at Alfred.

Alfred joined him and they stood with puzzled looks on their faces.

"What's that?" Dick picked up his ears becoming alert. A faint tapping and scratching became apparent. Dick strained to hear the noise. Then there was a click and a piece of the panelling swung outward hitting him.

"Oi!" He called with some surprise, jumping back as Bruce and Harry emerged through the concealed door.

"Sorry." Bruce apologised. "Wasn't sure just where you where stood. I didn't catch you did I Alfred?"

"No sir I'm alright. How did you find that?"

"Alfred even I didn't know of its existence, and I'm sure no one else did." Harry said with amazement.

"Well." Bruce began. "I noticed slight scuff marks on the carpet here." He pointed to the floor. "It looks like the marks a door leaves, yet there didn't appear to be one. Then as it was apparent the 'door' must have swung inwards into the room it seemed obvious to look next door. I found the place where the panels sounded hollow when tapped and then it only took a brief feel around to find the hidden catch."

"It was amazing." Harry interjected.

"Opening the panel it revealed a small space. I'm thinking it may have been a priest hole or some such hiding space. The back had obviously been worked on and another door created to gain entry into here."

Dick ducked through the door and then back.

"Incredible. So someone only had to get into the room next door then through here." He speculated. "But how did they get in the other room?"

Bruce beckoned them through the hidden door into the next room.

"Ok tell me what you see." He told Dick.

Dick shrugged.

"A room with dust sheets and tools. Paint pots. What am I looking for?"

"What about there?" Bruce pointed.

"A fireplace." Dick's eyes opened wide. "A fireplace. I reckon I'm beginning to think the same as you."

"Go on have a look; I think you will be small enough to get up there." Bruce urged.

"What! Oh ok." Dick stood in the hearth and ducked under the mantelpiece. "I can see straight up to the top." He called back. "It's too dark to see anything though I would need a torch."

"I'll get one, hang on a moment." Harry called as he disappeared through the door. He returned a few moments later torch in hand, and handed it to Dick who ducked back under the mantelpiece.

"Can you see anything?" Bruce asked him.

"Not just here. I reckon I'm going to have to climb up a way." Dick's feet disappeared from view."

"Be careful." Bruce called.

A couple of minutes later Dick's feet dropped back onto the hearth. He ducked back out.

"Someone has been climbing up and down the chimney recently. There are scratches on the sides that are fresh." He announced brushing the dirt from his trousers. He had a smudge of soot on his face and cobwebs in his hair.

"As I suspected." Bruce told them. "Harry is there any way I can access the roof?"

"Yes, this way." Harry led the way.

"Wait here." Bruce instructed Dick and Alfred. "We won't be long."

True to his word Bruce and Harry arrived back quickly. Dick raised his eyebrows questioningly.

"The roof has walkways erected to accommodate armed guards when the Queen is in residence and also when other dignitaries visit. From there it wouldn't take someone agile long to climb up and down. Then once vanish into the wooded area via the shrubbery."

"Neat. And the police haven't been able to find that out!" Dick exclaimed with astonishment.

Harry hung his head.

"No I'm afraid that had obviously escaped them."

"It wouldn't take a genius to override the surveillance cameras. In fact it looks as if they have been almost coming and going at their leisure."

Harry shook his head.

"Would you believe it." He muttered incredulously. "I suppose I had better pass this on to the police as soon as possible."

"I would be happy to speak with them too if it will help recover the items. I have an idea as to who is responsible." Bruce announced.

"You do? Alfred wasn't wrong when he said you where an amateur detective, although I haven't seen anything amateur about it yet." Harry told him with amazement.

"You really think you know who's behind this then?" Dick asked also amazed.

"Yes but I need to check some facts first to be one hundred percent certain."

Bruce settled back into the soft leather seat and lifted the newspaper up.

"Well at least you hit the headlines with something good this time." Dick chuckled. "Makes a change from them speculating on who you're sleeping with, or going to marry."

Bruce turned to the front page. The headline announced.

'_U.S. BILLIONAIRE BAGS BALMORAL BURGALAR'_

"Well it's quite alliteration but not strictly true." Bruce pointed out.

"Well who's checking? Thing is you helped solve the case." Dick pointed out.

"I suppose there is that, although I didn't expect the publicity."

"It's quite a double edged sword." Alfred pointed out. "On the one hand you have shown the police up in rather a bad light, that even an American 'playboy' could solve the mystery, and on the other earned the praises and respect of not only the Scots themselves but the Queen of England herself no less."

"Knighthood on the cards eh?" Dick laughed. "Before you shoot that one down in flames I know it's not possible. Anyway just what was it that made you realise that that guy was the perp?"

"Ok, it was his name that rang the alarm bells to begin with. Nick Hesse. Well Tsar Nicholas, the last Tsar of Russia was married to the Princess Alix of Hesse. It has long been rumoured that they sent some of their treasures over to the British royal family for safe keeping, hoping to be able to flee over to the U.K., which as we know never happened."

"Right I see, but why did he steal the chairs and eggs?" Dick looked somewhat puzzled.

"It would seem that he believed that he was a direct descendant of the Romanov's, fuelled by the fact he had haemophilia. Which history tells us ran in the family. Despite all the recent evidence that none of the family survived the assassination, he was convinced he was a true descendant and therefore had to retrieve the treasures he believed the British royal family had stolen."

"Oh I see. Pretty lofty ideals though, and he had hired someone to do the job?" Dick asked.

"Correct. He could hardly embark on such an endeavour with his condition."

"Well that's another job well done Sherlock." Dick quipped.

"It was all just elementary my dear Watson." Bruce grinned. "I'm sure there will be much more taxing problems awaiting us when we get home."

"Of that we can be sure off." Alfred agreed. "By the way young man. The young lady with the green eyes, Beth, wasn't it."

"What about her?"

"I was just wondering that's all, you know."

"Yes me too." Bruce added.

"Look we exchanged numbers and e-mail addresses etc, I didn't just drop her. I called her to let her know we were leaving as well. We said we would stay in touch."

Bruce and Alfred exchanged glances.

"What? Hey come on you guys, first of all I never kiss and tell and secondly well. Oh never mind" he waved his hand dismissively as Bruce and Alfred dissolved into fits of mirth. "I give in with you two."

Bruce and Alfred continued to chuckle.

Dick wagged his finger in their direction.

"Just you wait till we get home." He threatened.

100


End file.
